Sunday, February 27, 2005

A monkey, obnoxious B-Schoolers, USA investment returns low, cozy hockey game, a USATF championships beauty -- Dreams


1 THE MONKEY IN THE KITCHEN (melatonin influenced)

I saw a tan colored monkey about 3 feet tall in my kitchen near the window. It looked more than 3 feet tall, because its arms were so long. It had a blackish face. Looking at it, I felt afraid. It had that intense demeanour, that hyperactive energy that monkeys have. I was afraid it might bite me or attack me. I rushed out the front door of my apartment, locking the door behind me. On my way out, the monkey gently touched my hand with some parts of its body I'm not sure which parts. I woke up, but still felt frightened by the monkey, but not as frightened as I have been in dreams about ghosts or devils. Then I realized that it must have been a dream, because the only way I could have seen the monkey while lying in my bed, would be through dreaming about it.


I went to see Danny Rudolph, who was one of my best friends in grade school. Now he is dean of Stanford Business School. Before I had the dream, I was at the USATF track championships, where Amy Rudolph ran in the 3000 meters and some guy from Stanford ran in a men's long distance race. In the dream, I was in a building that used alot of wood in its construction, that was about five stories tall. On the top floor, the residence that I thought Danny lived in had white doors. I knocked on the white doors. Some people who were not Danny answered the knock. there were about a half dozen of them. They told me that Danny did not want to see me. These people were white males who were below average in height, and looked to be in their twenties or thirties. They were clean shaven. Most of them were all bundled up as if for the winter, though they were indoors. Their winter clothes featured alot of the blue color. One of them had a clean-shaven face shaped like a peanut and wore granny glasses. They were all hate-filled, rude, contemptuous. It seemed to me they were all constantly on the verge of physically attacking me. I found the only way that I could get them to be civil with me, was to talk to them as if I was an ignoramus in need of being enlightened by their august selves. I did'nt know where I was. They would not tell me where I was. Finally one of them told me that I was in Sudbury. Then I was in some kind of truck like vehicle these people were driving in. I think I was a stow-away on the vehicle. We ended up at this building whose architecture made it seem as if it was in California. It was white on the outside, it had courtyards and things that mixed with various types of plants. Inside the building, some people were holding a memorial service for a daughter of Richard Nixon who had been assassinated. When I awoke I was thinking that the only Sudbury I know of is Sudbury Massachusetts, which is near the town I live in, and whose only claim to fame that I know of is that it is the original home of model Kim Alexis.


In the dream I saw darkness, and the thought in my mind is that all of the USA's invested wealth, which in the dream was about one trillion dollars, had only returned 6 billion dollars in interest dividends etc. in one year.

4 THE COZY HOCKEY GAME (not sure if melatonin influenced)

I was a spectator at a pro ice hockey game. I had not gone to one of those in a long time. I had a seat near the rink. There was something cozy about it. I think that is because a greater percentage of the ice hockey players are white compared to other pro sports, and a greater percent are of normal or close to normal size compared to other pro sports. But I was not looking forward to watching the fights that I expected to break out during the game. I was planning on hiding my head so that I could not see the fights if they broke out. Seemed to me as if someone could get badly hurt in such fights.

5 THE USATF CHAMPIONSHIPS BEAUTY (not melatonin influenced)

Real waking life notes re events of the day before the dream: I had gone to see the USATF track championships. I felt these championships were maybe the heartiest track meet I have ever been to. I did feel too dissapointed by this championships track meet, because although it was not the most "electric" event or place I have ever been to, I have come to believe that for various reasons New England and university type people are simply relatively difficult to 'electrify' and that it will take time and patience to get them to the level of the more 'electric' groups and places. I had sent many emails with poetic prayers to lots of people connected with these championships a few days before the meet. There I saw a very pretty white woman whose first name was Natasha (I have spelled the name slightly differently from the way she spells it) and whose last name was British sounding. She like the other contestants wore her last name on a big white card she wore on her body. This impressed me because I have been feeling that track meets have been trying too hard to hide the identity of the competitors from the spectators, and this wearing the name was the opposite of such hiding. Natasha wore the her dark straight hair on her head like a boy, parted on the side, and she wore a long pony tail. She seemed to be a classic example of a certain type of woman, the slim small breasted type (my philosophy are that there are different types of women who can be compared with others of their own type but not with other types). Natasha reminded me what with her hairstyle of the way I looked when I was a boy (there are people who snicker scornfully at this kind of comparison but I plan on linking this blog-post to boyhood photos of me to douse their snickerings). Then I went to get a snack in the lobby, from the USATF snack-selling desk. There was a nice looking blondish clean shaven guy with a roundish face and a pleasant demeanor at this USATF snack-selling table. While he was selling me the snack, I thought I heard him mutter to me that "Natasha does" etc etc, meaning she wants to marry me. However, partly since I have due to a long series of misfortunes in a sense never lost my humility no matter how many beautiful women I hear want to marry me, I said nothing, feeling unsure as to whether it was just my imagination that he was saying this, even though hearing voices is not one of my characteristics.

In the dream, Natasha and some people and me were in a car in a tunnel, in summerish weather, driving in the direction of a lake. This light-blue colored lake reminded me of Natasha. The lake reminded me of her, or the lake reminded me of the relationship we had in the dream, I am not sure which it was. It felt pleasant to be in a relationship with someone who was (snip sarcastic scorn re such statements) similar to me.

Then, in another segment of this dream or in a separate dream, I was I was in a car with some people moving along a road in summerish weather. In the dream, my trust fund lawyer Janna (I have a small trust fund) had sent me some things, instead of buying something for me. One of the things she had sent me was a bag with about a quarter ounce of marijuana in it. This surprised me quite a bit, that she would send such to me. We who were in the car felt threatened by someone who we felt was following us. We got out of the car and ran through a playground. In the playground there was one of those dome like structures composed of steel colored bars that kids climb on the way people climb on ladders. I was climbing down one of these ladder like things. Beneath me on the ladder like thing there were one or two muscular guys, I had to get from being above them to being below them to get down the ladder like thing. One of these guys was about six feet tall, medium build in terms of heaviness, muscular, well proportioned, clean shaven, with normal length brown hair, who wore spectacles. He used his body to help me climb down past him. He was pleasant and nice. Then we got in another car and continued on our way in the direction of Waltham.

NOTE ON KEEPING A DREAM LOG: Some may frown on me keeping this kind of dream log. My idea, is that one thing about dream-logs, is that they keep you from getting bogged down in any one topic or repeating yourself too much. Politicians may not keep public dream logs, but in the Bible we read of kings discussing their dreams with their advisers. There is a line in the Bible that states that prophets who have dreams should tell people about their dreams. I believe (scriptures corroborate this) that some dreams are insightful, and some are not. Also though scripture does not say this I figure that some dreams are a mix sight of insight and the lack thereof.

Saturday, February 26, 2005

Charged particle science, in trouble at college, two women, roofless luxury houses -- Dreams

Dreams I've had, February 24-26

1 WEIRD CHARGED PARTICLE SCIENCE (not sure if melatonin-pill influenced)

In the dream, things appeared sort of like a dimly lit science diagram. Two negatively charged "masanic" particles were released creating a field, like an electro-magnetic or electrical field. These particles in the dream were "masanic" particles, spelled m-a-s-a-n-i-c. That is the way the name was spelled in the dream. (Some people--I do not know any such people-- have as a last name the name Masanic; Masan is the name of a place in S Korea). Then more negatively charged particles were released into the field created by the "masanic" particles. After these latter particles were released into the field created by the first particles, weird things happened such as: a large radio or TV in the vicinity of the charged field suddenly turned on with its audio blasting at a very high volume.

2 GETTING IN TROUBLE AT A COLLEGE (not sure if melatonin-pill influenced)

I was attending some college. I had a white clean shaven boyish-looking male room-mate who had straight black hair, was of medium build, and was about five feet eight inches tall, a couple of inches shorter than me. Sems we were in some kind of trouble. We had to go to meet this woman who was a supervisor or some such thing in a bathroom. This supervisor was of medium to thin build, caucasian, white, with straight brown somewhat past shoulder length hair. She had a large beak-like nose that stuck out about five inches. As it turned out, though both of us were marched to the bathroom, he was the one who was in trouble. The room-mate got kicked out of the college. The problem with me was, that though the school year had started three or four weeks ago, I still had not registered for any classes. I had to put the notes I had been making in my computer on floppy disks and send them to the big-nosed woman. One of the buildings was like a huge circular room about 100 feet high and 300 feet wide; there was a circular balcony about 30 feet above the ground around the perimeter of the room; to the inside side of the circular balcony you could look down on the first floor of the gigantic room, and to the right side of the circular balcony there were very large classrooms. The architecture and interior dec was modern, wall to wall brown colored carpeting, goldish colored sophisticated lighting. One of the classrooms entered from the balcony was filled with about 1000 students in a lecture hall. I thought I was out of trouble with big-nosed woman, but then I felt her poke me in the side twice with a pencil while I was lying in bed.

3 THE BLOG-POST ABOUT TWO WOMEN (not sure if melatonin-pill influenced)

I saw on an internet web page black font color text in a paragraph which had plenty of space between the lines; the text looked the way arial size ten font in an email looks when a blog-post is posted to this blog by email. Most of the words in the text were in yellow hilite; lots of the words were in bold-face type. The text was about this pretty but not fat woman in the area who has gigantic muscular thighs and this other sexy wide hipped but slim red-headed busty woman I ran into at the local Exxon gas station who expressed an interest in sex//marriage with me.

4 THE LUXURY HOUSES WITHOUT ROOFS (melatonin-pill influenced)

I was walking along the side of a road out in some suburban, almost rural type area on a summerish fairly sunny day; the road was sort of on top of a hill, and to the left of the road there was a valley with about twelve houses in it, that were bordered by a forest like area with lots of tall trees. The houses in this luxury community were circular shaped, about forty yards in diameter. They were all single-story. None of them had roofs but they were finished, people were living in them--aparently they were not even supposed to have roofs. Since the houses did not have roofs from the road I could see right into the rooms. One of the rooms, a typical room for this community, had a large approx nine foot diameter circular bed in it with a white bedspread. One side of the bed was angled upwards at about a 45 degree angle forming a kind of backrest. In the area a person lying on the bed would lean her or his back against on this backrest, was what looked like a TV screen on a TV that has been turned off; this TV-screen-like area was about two feet high and four feet wide. Standing by the side of the road was a stocky young white clean shaven male with normal length straight red hair who was about five feet eight inches in height. Though I had never seen him, he was from University High school in Chicago. He reminded me of a couple of people from U-high. He was irascible, irritable, hostile. He was from this luxury community. But there was another young white male from this community, who was like the red-haired one, only less stocky, about five feet six inches tall, with black hair. This shorter black haired guy was friendly. I went inside one of the luxury houses with him.

About the time I had the above dream, I had some other dreams that I could not remember for more than a few seconds after I had them.

Monday, February 21, 2005

First trade paragraph in" 2005 Economic Report of the President" Refuted

The first paragraph of the "Modern International Trade" section of the introductory "Overview" in the 2005 Economic Report of the President reads:

"Chapter 8, Modern International Trade, examines the benefits of free trade and discusses the progress the Administration has made in opening global markets. Open markets and free trade raise living standards both at home and abroad. Any move toward economic isolationism would threaten the competitive gains made by U.S. exporters while harming U.S. consumers and firms that benefit from imports."

My response:

The statement, "Open markets and free trade raise living standards both at home and abroad" is an unsubstantiated statement; it is a statement that lacks meaning, because the higher living standards allegedly produced by free trade, could be rooted in ephemeral impermanent sources of national wealth and income such as money borrowed from abroad, and cash on hand due to sale of assets to foreigners.

The paragraph talks of threats to competitive gains made by US exporters. Fact is, there is no such thing as a US exporter. Rather, there are US based businesses, who make sales in their own nation, while at the same time they make sales abroad. It is superstitious to assume, that sales to foreigners have a greater value than sales to domestics, simply because one type of sale crosses a geo-political line in the sand. If gains made by "exporters" due to free trade are outweighed by losses they experience due to a fall in demand in domestic markets, then, despite any "competitive gains" such exporters are making, the result is a loss for the exporters. Therefore to simply declare that competitive gains made by US exporters are threatened by "moves to isolationism", is meaningless.

Likewise there is no such thing as a "US consumer"; in reality, with a few exceptions such as the wealthy who do not need to bother working, there are consumers who also do the opposite of consuming, which is working and earning. If the harm generated by "free trade" in terms of its impact on US "consumer" income streams outweighs the benefits derived from "free trade" by such so-called "consumers" in terms of prices of goods, then, despite the fact that US "consumers" are harmed as consumers by "isolationism", the "free trade" does them no good. Thus, again, the mere statement that "US consumers" are "harmed by isolationism", is meaningless.
The mere fact so called "economic isolationism" "threatens competitive gains made by US exporters," is meaningless, because the question is, would the harm to such "competitive gains" caused by "isolationism", outweigh, as a consideration, the advantages to be found in such "isolation"?

As for firms that benefit from imports being harmed by "economic isolationism", again this is meaningless. If the benefits that accrue to society via "economic isolationism" outweigh the harm done to importers through "economic isolationism", then the "economic isolationism" is worthwhile, despite the fact that it "harms importers". If domestic income streams dry up because they have been diverted to foreign lands through free trade, then domestic consumers will not have any money to spend on imports, as a result of which the importers will go bankrupt.

This Economic Report of the President is obsessed with the hundreds-of-years old theories of Ricardo. Ricardo's theories in the eyes of many academic nuts, prove all kinds of things they do not prove at all. Ricardo's mistake was that he ignored the benficial spinoffs produced for economies when domestic producers spend their money in the country creating chain-reactions as money is spent and earned. Yet one thing his theories do illustrate, is that just as certain producers have a "competitive advantage" in terms of cost-effective production over others, so also, ( I would add), certain producers have a "competitive advantage" over others in terms of their ability to make sales to given groups.

The problem with the "free trade", is, that it diverts income streams that are harvested by producers, exporters and importers from domestic markets; these income streams are diverted to foreign markets, where the US producers suffer "competitive disadvantage" relative to the foreign producers for whom those foreign markets is home turf.

If there was an economy on the moon, the doctors, lawyers, restauranteurs, carpenters, tailors, teachers, and dancers on the moon, would then, of course, be in a much better position to harvest income streams generated on the moon through free trade, than earthly lawyers, doctors, restauranteurs, carpenters, tailors, teachers, and dancers would be.

@2005 David Virgil Hobbs

Friday, February 18, 2005

An Elixir, a Magic Playground (with real life religious experience), Iran, Basketball -- Dreams

Four Dreams I've Had in the Last Couple of Days (Melatonin-pill influenced)
(#2 describes a related real-life experience that got me serious about Christianity)


I was out on a green field surrounded by woods. It was daylight. I was thirsty. I had a choice between two drinks that appealed to me, that seemed to be almost as good as magical elixirs. One of the drinks was lemonade combined with an alcoholic beverage such as wine or whisky; I do not remember now exactly what the lemonade was combined with. The ingredients in the other drink I do not now remember. There seemed to be something really special about the lemonade combined with the whatever it was combined with. Maybe one of these days someone will discover that lemonade combined with some kind of alcoholic beverage is especially healthy in some way.


Real-life Notes:

The summer after I graduated from high school, someone gave me a little white pill. I do not know exactly what it was. I took it, left my friends, and walked off alone in the direction of 55th St. in Hyde Park Chicago, where at the intersection with Blackstone Street there are these two big wide tall white apartment buildings with a playground at one end. That playground is now a swimming pool. This school days friend of mine Wayne Braxton was in the playground with Linda Skinner. We played frisbee together. I felt different than I have ever felt. I felt on top of the entire world, energetic, happy. I played frisbee with them with grace and joy. I felt like a God. I probably looked like a God too, wearing these blue overalls and a red plastic derby hat.

Linda was thrilled to play frisbee with me that day I could tell. She was smiling and clapping her hands together. Her hair was long straight and yellow; these was the days when she was at the apex of her beauty; she seemed like a goddess to me. She sat down on a see-saw in front of me and leaned backwards into me, and I leaned backwards to properly avoid her touch.

I felt like the top of my head had been taken off, as a result of which the impediments that kept my mind and soul down when I was in a "normal" state were gone. Playing frisbee with her and Wayne under the influence of that pill I fell in love with her. But afterwards when I would talk to her, she would not even smile or date me. I figured this was because she only liked me when I was under the influence of some pill. Since then I have heard it was because her father would not let me marry her.

A few months after I first met Linda in the playground, in a despondent state of mind I went to the playground and sat down on top of the slide. I prayed God for a sign, asking him to show me how I could be in the state of mind I was in on the pill, without taking any pills. I left a date (those things people eat) on the slide as an offering to God. Then I heard a car honking, honk honk honk honk it just kept on honking. It seemed to me as if the honking car was sympathizing with me. I walked over to look inside the car that was honking. There was nobody in the car, but there was a Holy Bible on the front dashboard. Although I had always believed in God and Christ, I took this as a sign from God. I became serious about Christianity, read the Bible, and prayed. Then I had religious experiences that gave me among other things certain knowledge that Christ is the Son of God, and knowledge that certain parts of the Bible are inspired by God.

In the dream:

I saw these two tall white women, standing on the sidewalk on the southern side of the two white buildings. I saw them from about ten yards away. They both had straight hair that was slightly longer than shoulder length. They wore it in the style wherein the hair falls from the hairline to the outside of the eyebrow, so the area between the outside of the eyebrow and the ear is covered with a patch of hair.

Their hairstyle reminded me of at least a couple of Bible scriptures, such as, "Their camels shall become booty, their herds of cattle a spoil. I will scatter to every wind those who cut the corners of their hair, and I will bring their calamity from every side of them, says the LORD" (Jeremiah 49:32), and, "Do not trim off the hair on your temples or clip the edges of your beards" (Leviticus 19:27). I have been under the impression that such references to hairstyles have to do with the wide faces of the original Alpine Aryan Israelites, and how a tuft of hair to the outside of each eyebrow can be aesthetic on such wide faces which feature space outside the outside corners of the eyebrows.

In the dream, one of them, the one facing to my right, and facing towards the one facing towards me, had brown hair. The one facing towards me, had yellow hair. They were both pregnant. The one with brown hair had huge breasts, they came down to her groin and stuck out about a yard. I had seen both of these women standing just like this in an earlier dream, only in the earlier dream the brown haired woman's breasts were not as big or visible.

I think the brown haired one in the dream represented this woman who I saw once at Bentley near their soccer field. In real life, I kicked the ball over the fence, and went to fetch it; as I picked it up, I looked at this woman who was walking away from me and was about fifteen yards from me. At the exact same instance I looked at her, although she had her back turned towards me, she twisted her torso to the right, as a result of which I could see that she had very large breasts that stuck out about 1.5 feet.

I have been unable to link up with this soccer field woman, my emails to Bentley about her went unanswered, but I have heard some rumor she has an interest in me, from people who are unable or unwilling to bother with actually linking me up with her (are'nt they nice).

I think the yellow haired one in the dream represented this tall pretty Bentley woman who in real life sat down next to me in the Bentley college library one day, and said to me, "I'm in love with you". When she said this, I was feeling so intimidated by campus and public police having persecuted me, barred me from campuses, and shouted at me, due to trivial so called social "infractions" having to do with my attempts to socialize with women, that I said, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Likewise, in real life, once when I was in the Weston Public Library, this pretty young woman with straight brown hair who was sitting next to me, noticed that I was looking at photos of big breasted woman on the internet, and launched into a speech about how her breasts were bigger than the breasts in the woman in the photo and how I was intelligent looking and how I could f--- her, but I said nothing, because the shock of having been persecuted by police had numbed me into a kind of silence.


I was in a room, indoors, and my father's sister, who is now deceased, was sitting on a bed. I was talking to her. I do not remember now the exact words I used, but basically I told her, that some people were planning on attacking Iran, because in their minds 25 nuclear weapons were equal to 250 nuclear weapons which were equal to 2500 nuclear weapons, and Iran was on its way to having 25 nuclear weapons. What I meant and what I was saying, was, that in the minds of the people attacking Iran, for all practical purposes 25 nukes were equal to 250 and to 2500, and so they were determined to attack before Iran could produce 25 nukes.


In the dream, I was one of the guards on the U of Alabama basketball team. We were playing the U of Florida basketball team in a tournament. We beat them. After the game, we were sitting by the side of the basketball court, and watching the next team that we were going to play in basketball. This team had two guys with dark brown hair, their hairtstyles were similar to the ones the Bentley ladies wore in (3) above. They both were able to "stuff" the basketball, without even jumping off the ground.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Why are employers trashing attractive men and favoring socially unpopular females?

A letter to Henry Makow at


I have a few questions for you (Henry Makow) re feminism and employers favoring "ugly", or more politely, relatively socially unpopular people, even though I can't say that I agree with or believe everything you write.

Some Doubts I Have re Things You Write

For an example of comments of yours I have doubts about, you seem to ascribe to a me-Tarzan you-Jane view of the relationship between the sexes; yet, you yourself do the cooking and the shopping while your wife works; and you talk about how dominant forces in society are turning society upside-down. The fact is, if couples are to prove themselves resilient to the upside-down forces in society you speak of, they have to transcend the macho-man feminine-woman stereotypes you apparently favor. For example, if the man in a couple has been financially broken by the upside-down forces in the world, then, if a couple is to transcend such forces, they have to adapt themselves to such a situation by for example putting up with the woman making the money and the man doing something else.

You talk about how women are supposed to by "hypergamous", meaning that they favor men who socio-economically speaking outrank them, but recent research ( ) concluded:

Somewhat surprisingly, factors that you might think would be really important to people, like religion, education and income, played very little role in their (heterosexual dating) choices...Psychology has often viewed relationships as transactions where people select mates based on substantial qualities a mate has to offer, such as power and money...But the data show that, when people meet face-to-face, things like smoking preferences and bank accounts don't seem to hurt complexities of attraction, according to Kurzban.
My personal experience is, that women like to be socially dominated, but that does not mean they are obsessed with money. Starting back in high school I noticed how girls go for guys who treat them almost contemptuously, due to the many social opportunities they have. I noticed how girls trash boys who "need" them and cling to them and are "nothing" without them. Having noticed that, in my later life I made a point of socially dominating women, going out and finding attractive women who have an interest in me; seems such domination really does get women to respect you and turns them on.

You seem to consider heterosexual marriage to be the sine quo non of the Christian spiritual life, yet St, Paul (1 Corinthians 7:7-8) said:

Indeed, I wish everyone to be as I am (celibate), but each has a particular gift from God, one of one kind and one of another...Now to the unmarried and to widows, I say: it is a good thing for them to remain as they are...

Also, you seem dedicated to painting the average Jew as completely unstained by the stains of guilt you see in the elite "Masonic" Jews, even though (with all due respect re the good qualities of Jews) evidence indicates otherwise.

And you are so (apparently) brave and outspoken, that, people wonder if you are secretly in league with the forces you attack.

Four Questions I Have For You

Nevertheless, whether or nor you are an agent of the forces you attack, you have become a leading internet crusader vs. feminism and homosexuality; you have shown yourself to be intelligent hard working and thoughtful re such subjects; and you read and answer your emails. If you are internet-savvy and have a question re homosexuality and-or feminism, and feel annoyed by these phenomena, who do you think of? Makow. So I read your "best of Makow" articles on feminism and heterosexuality and have some questions to ask you:

1. You talk about feminism being a tool of shadowy elites trying to crush and enslave society. But females are the "liberals" who vote for "liberal" candidates who dare to do things like favor "redistributive" taxation conservative commentators such as Limbaugh despise. How do you explain that?

2. How do you explain the mania that employers seem to have developed for hiring relatively socially unpopular, "unattractive" males and females? How does this phenomenon fit into your scheme of things?

3. How do you explain a situation where you have an intelligent male who is unusual only in the sense of having skin that is slightly brownish, and who at least twenty SEXY beautiful women (the number is always rising) have expressed an interest in marrying, but who is rejected for a job by employers every time there is more than one applicant for a job? I read somewhere that the alleged "New World Order" elites are forging some kind of alliance with the "dorks" and "losers" of society.

At one point I thought I had figured it out. I figured that employers trash men who lots of beautiful women want to marry, because women are liberal, and the beautiful women are the powerful liberals. But then I realized that, (though this might explain things when employers are not feminist) these same employers, are ferociously discriminating against men!

4. Given how brown-skinned foreigners and immigrants are supposedly being favored by the dominant elites, how do you explain rabid discrimination against a male with light-brown skin?

Is (the skin-color discrimination) it because the low-level personnel officers who are doing the hiring think differently from the elites? I cannot find the page now, but I read somewhere that a survey for which at least ten thousand people were interviewed, found that US people actually prefer "olive" skin to white skin (olive is usually thought of as a kind of green but sometimes it refers to a light-brown color see ).

The kinds of social disorders I have described are worthy of the attention of clever men such as yourself. It is not just a matter of, women being hired instead of men, or gays being hired instead of straights; it is also a matter of WHICH straight guy, and WHICH woman.

-- David

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

A French snob, a tough white neighborhood, cool Harvard wrestlers -- dreams

Dreams I had Feb 13-15 (melatonin-pill-influenced)

Introductory note re screw-ups by, possibly psychic elements in dream #3:

This blog-post was originally posted to at 1:17 AM Feb 15, by e-mail, or so I thought. But, like approximately one third of the blog-posts I attempt to post by e-mail to my blog here at, (though I did not realize this) it never made it on to the blog!
After I attempted to post this blog-post at 1:17 AM Feb 15, at 7:00 PM Feb 15, I came across an article on the web about how a big palace that belonged to Rome's first kings, had just been discovered beneath the Roman "Forum", which is in the same area of Rome as the Colosseum ( ). The dream I had that might be connected with the Roman archaeological discovery is dream #3 below, entitled, "The Harvard Wrestlers". I am re-posting this blog-post now, at 9:30 PM, on Thursday Feb 17. But I am giving it the post-time which it originally should have had, 1:17 AM Feb 15., somehow managed to attribute the approximate original attempted post-time (1:17 AM Feb 15) of this blog-post entitled "A French snob, a tough white neighborhood, cool Harvard wrestlers -- dreams", to an earlier blog-post entitled "the hidden 22, investments up, dirty water, two sons: dreams", which was posted Friday, February 11, 2005 8:29 PM. Small consolation that hidden away in some obscure locations are the records of the attempts to post this blog-post by email.
This is a mess, the way so many of the attempts to post to blogs at by e-mail do not succeed, or are given the wrong date-time stamps. We do not have the time and energy, to, every time we attempt to post by e-mail, hang around to check to see if the post actually worked, and re-post if it did not. Some of these blog-posts contain possibly psychic elements which render time of post important. What if I was reccommending some stock purchase or sale, and these kind of screw-ups occurred? I am seriously considering going back to newsgroups--newsgroups might be polluted by rude psychos but this might be even worse.


A French man told me that SB (the Super Bowl lady see previous blog-post) did not want to see me. In the dream SB was working down by the police station on Lexington St. She was not working on Main St. where she works in real life. The French "snob" seemed tall, about six feet five inches tall, and dark, though I did not see him. He seemed athletically built. He had a deep voice and a French accent. It seemed as if he was a harsh, aggressive snob.


I was outdoors playing with young people, seemed to be evening, late daylight, summerish weather, clear skies. I was in an area where there were football sized parks, lawns, houses. The area was divided up into "turfs" that belonged to various gangs. I strayed into the wrong territory. Keith Getz who in real life went to my high school threw rocks at me. About 15 yards away I could see him crouching behind a hillock about 3 or 4 feet high. I think it was Keith but it might have been Andy his brother.

I ran through an opening in a hedgerow into a nearby football field sized park surrounded by trees. In the park there was a short white medium build woman with long wavy dark brown hair, who belonged to some gang I was not in. I threw a big pear at her, football style, for her to catch. The pear was the size of a grapefruit, with one end elongated into a narrow handle-like prouberance. The pear sank like a baseball sinker only more severely as it sailed towards her after I threw it to her football style from about 15 yards away. She caught it. Then she she was no longer hostile. I had not thrown the pear at her to hurt her, but as a kind of friendly present.

There was a football game on the field, it was about eight white young men on each team. The QB on my team was Michael Gross. I was at a tight end position. The opposing player on the other team, who would rush at me after the snap of the ball, was also Michael Gross. He was making growling sounds like an animal, this was his idea of psyching me out.


I was on the Harvard campus. It was late evening, daylight, summerish, clear skies weather. I wanted to watch a wrestling tournament at Harvard. The cops at the building I was at, would not let me in the building to watch the wrestling tourney, although I was not barred from campus. One of the cops was clean shaven, white, with normal length straight black hair. His typicalish looking face was not the Harvard student or staff type of face. It was more like the middle class working class non-academic face. He had a pompous demeanour. To me it seemed as if he was a pompous punk; to me, it seemed that he was disorderly, because of the way he was pompous with me, even though he was physically and mentally speaking inferior to me. He was about six feet tall and medium to thin in build, but he seemed kind of pudgy as opposed to muscular though he was not fat. He wore the blue short sleeved uniform, I think he was not wearing his cop-hat. I was thinking of myself as a potential wrestler. I finally after making some phone calls to Harvard administrators and so forth, got allowed in the building to watch the wrestling tourney at Harvard.

The building where the tourney is at was somewhere around the Harvard Law School. There were huge halls inside the building, that were much bigger than the total size of the building as seen from outside. The inside looked like the interior of a medieval european castle. I was in a long curving hallway, on a floor at least a couple of feet off the ground. The hallway curved like the perimeter of a circle about four hundred yards wide. On one side of the curving hall there were pillars and arch shaped windows looking out into the sky, and on the other side was this giant "bowl" that was like a Roman Colosseum.

The curving perimeter hall and the Colosseum-bowl within were both made primarily out of some sand-colored type of stone. The stone was well crafted and curved and smoothed, as if worked by strong men or powerful machines. The architectural style was sort of a cross between medieval Norman and classical Roman, more subdued, and less ornate than Norman, more blocky and simple than Norman.

The wrestling tourney was in the Colosseum-like area. I was hanging out with some Harvard alum who was a wrestler. He was short, caucasian, brown skinned, normal-length slightly wavy black haired. He ws of about medium build. He wore these space-age dark blue-almost-black opaque colored sunglasses, the type where the rims are the same color and material as the lense. The sunglasses made him look intimidating but when he took his sunglasses off he looked trustworthy. He said he could bench press 500 pounds. By way of contrast I can bench press less than 200 pounds.

I was wondering how much the ability to bench press lots of weights, has to do with the ability to wrestle. I liked these Harvard wrestler guys I was hanging out with. They were not unnaturally pompous stiff cold pretentious etc etc like a fair number of the Harvard and Boston area people seem to be. I enjoyed being around them; it was energizing to be around them.

Friday, February 11, 2005

the hidden 22, investments up, dirty water, two sons: dreams

Dreams I've had since approx Feb 8 2005

NOTE: Though this blog-post was posted on Tueday Feb 11 8:29 PM, for some reason listed it as posted on Tuesday Feb 15 at 233 AM. I have changed the time and date of this blog-post from Feb 15, 233 AM to Feb 11, 8:29 AM, which is what it should be. Section 1 of this (below) discusses a dream in a blog-post, "Super Bowl & College Track Beauties" that I attempted to post on Feb 9, at 9:00 PM. However the "Super Bowl & College Track Beauties" blog-post, posted by e-mail, never made it on to the online blog. Therefore, Section 1, below, did not make sense, until I finally succeeded in getting the blog-post about the "Super Bowl & college track beauties into the online blog. This kind of thing, is UTTERLY DISASTROUS, if a blog is to be used to show how dreams can be psychic. The fact that the blog-author can change blog-post times and dates does not help either. It is a small consolation that my attempts to post blogs by email, that never get posted, are recorded in some obscure locations. I guess a blog by itself is not a good tool for showing how dreams can at least seem to be psychic.

1. Perhaps the dream about the female college track star was connected with the accident at Boston University

It was Wednesday morning at 100 AM that the train hit those two Boston University students (except for those for whom we should not ask such things, I ask you God in the name of Yayzoos known as Jesus your Son, have mercy on the souls of all who have died including these two students). I had the dream about the female track star, Caitlyn, having hidden away 22 inch long breasts, either before or after this unfortunate occurrence, some time between late Tuesday evening and Wednesday morning.

The dream was about this beautiful female college track star, who seems to have normal sized breasts, regarding whom in real life, her team-mates said to me, that she'd marry me. Decribing the dream I noted that having been barred from the Boston University and Brandeis campuses, if the track meet had been held on one of those campuses, I would have never been able to meet this female college track star Caitlyn.

It is possible that the dream about the 22 inch college track star, was in some way connected to the unfortunate incident at Boston University. The dream could have been a premonition of the event, or it could have been a sympathetic reaction to the event after it occurred.

(Related) Today Friday in real life:

I must admit that I ate at the soup kitchen, because I got all my money tied up getting a credit card, did not get a gift card I was supposed to get, have had problems getting money out of my Trust Fund, and could not work because my car according to the mechanic should not be driven on the highway now.

Serving food at the Soup Kitchen, were two pretty semi-provocatively dressed (tight clothes) students from Brandeis, which I am barred from for what I consider to be mountain made out of molehill type reasons. Chief Callahan at Brandeis would not lift the bar on me when I called him on the phone a year or two after I was barred. I have now been barred from Brandeis for about ten years. The two pretty white straight-brown-haired (Brandeis has more gentiles than jews) Brandeis students smiled at me and seemed glad to see me; they had a human warmth to them. Of the shorter one of the two it could be said, that you would not be able to find a better looking female on the Brandeis campus. Her straight long brown hair reached her hips and her pretty face was prettier than typically pretty.

I asked the taller one of them what group they were from. She said they were from the Hunger and Homelessness Group, which was a sub-group of the "Waltham Greoup" at Brandeis. She smiled at me as she said this. I was kind of suprised that she would be as friendly as she was, with a guy who was eating at the Soup Kitchen. Her face slightly reminded me of Elvis Presley's but her hair was brown, female-length and straight. She happened to be about eight feet away from Bob Gilbert who was sitting at one of the tables when I asked her the question.

Then I asked Bob if he needed a ride home. He said he needed a ride but did not want a ride, he was going to take the bus home. He was crabbily annoyed with me; he claimed that he was going to chat up this Brandeis student, but I got in the way by quizzing her when she was in his imperial vicinity. Bob has impaired eyesight. He invariably is crabby with me when I happen to be at his apartment or meet him anywhere. He thinks of himself as advanced in computer science. He eats at the Soup Kitchen almost every day.

The guy who these Brandeis young women were with, was a nice looking white guy with straight black hair, clean shaven, about average height. He did not seem too thrilled when he saw me quiz the Brandeis female Elvis. He sort of hanged his head as he cleaned the tables after I did this.

Nowadays crabby jealous Bob Gilbert, is the one who always stands up in front of everyone to say the prayer before each meal at the Soup Kitchen. For a long time I have had the 1 Timothy 6:17-19 quote on my resume, for a long time I have been involved in writing up religious prose and poetry, all this time Bob Gilbert has been constantly crabby with me, and now, he is the one who says the prayers at the Soup Kitchen every day!

2. $225k Trust Fund rises by $45k

In the dream, my trust fund was worth about $225,000. I saw words attesting to this effect, written out in large whitish-grayish script letters about eight inches high, against a black background. The letters were sort of hard to see. The words that were written out said that the worth of my trust fund had risen by $45,000 in one day. I had this dream one or two nights ago.

3. The dirty glass of water

In the dream I saw a glass of water, that was about half full. I could'nt exactly specify why the glass of water was dirty. Seemed there was some kind of crimsonish colored piece of rubber attached to it on the inside near the rim. Seemed the rim area had what looked like dried glue around it. I was really thirsty so I took a sip of the glass of water anyway. Something about the smell of the glass of water, brought to my mind the semen of a horse, although I do not really know what the semen of a horse smells like. It smelled sort of ammonia like.

4. Dream about longing for a female

In the dream, I was closely surrounded by thin metal rectangular sheets, that were about the size of posters people have on their walls. These metal sheets were different shades of brown. I felt hemmed in by them. They felt hot. I felt hot and dry. I felt like I would like to be around Linda, who I discussed in the previous blog-post about the Mound Builders.

5. Dream about LW & HL having boys

In the dream, I was in Iraq. I was shown someone's vision of what he hoped Iraq would look like in the future. I saw a very big, extremely modern city. It had tons of skyscrapers. I saw this city from up in the air, at night time. Seemed I was being flown through the air, to see this person's idea of what he wanted and hoped this city to look like. Then I was flown further on, and shown a vision of what this person wanted the deserts of Iraq thgat bordered this city to look like in the future. Where the desert that bordered the first city I was shown reached a large body of water, the water was made use of to reclaim the desert land and make it habitable and usable. Large gleaming modern skyscraper filled cities were on the desert land that had been improved. There must have been about a dozen of them in the desert side by side. All of these cities, the first one I saw, and the ones on the desert land that had been improved by water, were the size of cities like Chicago.

On a porch at this time while I was not flying, in the daylight time, I saw these two boys. They had normal length straight black hair. I did not see their faces well; they were playfully sort of wrestling, one of them had a bear hugh on the other from behind. Their faces looked like normal white American faces. They looked like twins. They were both about five feet seven inches tall. They both had sparse or cut-short beards and I think also mustaches. They both had black hair on their chests. The stripe of hair on their chests was similar to a wide triangle about three to four inches high and reached from one side of the torso to the other, it was shaped sort of like a triangle with one point on the bottom of the triangle in the middle of the triangle. These boys were not moderately stocky but not fat; their muscles were not well defined like a weightlifter's muscles. Their shoulders were of about average width. One of them was the son of LW by me and the other was the son of HW by me (see previous blog).

After I awoke I felt confused. HW is a pretty muscular glamazon with very wide shoulders, who is about five feet nine inches tall. LW is a pretty muscular glamazon with very wide shoulders who is about five feet four inches tall average height for a woman. I am five feet ten inches tall, with normalish sized shoulders, and of medium build, and I have almost no hair on my chest. So then how could these boys be only five feet seven inches tall, despite having all that hair on their chest? How could they not be muscular and wide shouldered?

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Super bowl and college track beauties; bookcases -- dreams

Three dreams I have had recently


In the dream I saw the white woman who pops up in dreams around Super Bowl time (I'll here call her SB). I had the dream a day or two before the Super Bowl and was going to report it prior to the Bowl but decided not to because I thought such might defile the Super Bowl.

SB exists in real life. Her shoulders are 40 inches wide approx, she has a pretty face and straight brown hair and is about five feet ten inches tall.

In the dream I saw a trapezoid (A quadrilateral having two parallel sides); the upper side of it was about 24 inches wide, and the lower side of it was about 16 inches wide. The lower side was about 12 inches below the upper side. The trapezoid was a brown line on a white background. Inside and outside the line that formed the trapezoid there was simply white. The brown line was about an inch wide. It ran like a straight line between the upper left corner and the lower left corner, same with the right corners, so overall it looked like a distorted square. The brown line about an inch wide was SB's shaved [DELETED] hair, and the white skin the skin in her groin area which was flat not fat.

When I awoke, I was thinking, man, that lady must have really wide hips! In real life she wore that long hospital type white overcoat-robe type thing doctors and nurses wear when I saw her so I did not see how wide her hips were.

In the earlier dream about the piece of bacon sizzling when it encountered the boys with the big feet, the piece of bacon slid out of a white cloth envelope that resembled the white hospital type overcoat SB wears draped over her huge shoulders. I think maybe the piece of bacon represented a woman I saw on Bacon St., who is connected with SB somehow.


In the dream I saw pretty white approx five feet nine inches tall Caitlyn.

Real life note: She used to be a college track star; she looks like a tall strong marilyn Chambers with short hair; I heard at the track meet a rumor that she'd marry me. Lucky for me, I encountered Caitlyn at a track meet that was not held at Boston University, or Brandeis, which have both barred me from campus for reasons that in my opinion are trivial.

In the dream, she was standing about fifteen feet away looking like a normally dressed woman, dressed in a gray plad long sleeved shirt and pants. the stripes on the shirt were crimson and other colors. I think she was wearing blue jeans. I could not see her well. She stood in front of a brown background. It was like a scratchy out of focus photograph.

The thought in my mind in the dream, was that her breasts stuck out 22 INCHES or were 22 INCHES long.

Since in real life Caitlyn wearing a bra appeared to have average or slightly larger than average breasts, when I awoke I could not believe that she was really that big-chested; and I wondered at how she could heroically accomplish such great things in track despite the burden of large (but hidden in a minimizer), heavy breasts.


There were these two college basketball teams playing each other on a basketball court. It appeared to be a scrimmage as opposed to a competition match. A good number of the players were tall strong and white. Around the far right corner of the basketball court, there were these dark brown shiny bookcases with books in them, lined up along the edges of the corner, running about 10 feet down the border of the court in both directions at the corner.

These book cases were right on the border of the wall at the edge of the indoor basketball court; the borders of the court were right at the wall itself. The bookcases belonged to me and had my books and papers in them and I had put them there. For some reason it had not even occurred to me that me putting them there could cause any problem for the players on the court.

The two teams went about playing there game while they ignored the bookcases that it seemed obviously got in their way. The bookcases did not bother them at all.

Despite the fact the bookcases did not bother them, I moved the bookcases from the gym up to the roof. I used an elevator to move them to the roof on the sixth floor. It was a cool yet warm starry night on the roof. I wondered how I could cover up the bookcases with the books on them on the roof so rain and snow would not damage them.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Midwestern kids (such as me) descended from Atlantis & Lost Tribes of Israel?

We hear alot of boasting from people descended from "ancient Israelites" who for some reason lacked the ability to understand and follow Christ, about what a special chosen people they are and how the populations containing the descendants of "ancient Israelites" who accepted Christ are junk.

Reminds me of how a long time ago I was "in love" with this girl Linda. She and I were both of midwestern US ancestry. She was thrilled by me the first time we met, and then later she would never smile, would not be my girlfriend, would not marry me. I was mystified. I was emotionally screwed up. No matter what I did I could not get her though I was convinced we were potentially a special couple. I had dreams (long before 1997 discoveries of Greg Little re the Moundbuilders of the US midwest), about how me Linda were in love and holding hands in the shadow of those big circular American Indian burial mounds.

Lately I have heard some rumor that the problem was that Linda's dad (now deceased) would not let me marry her. This news makes me feel angry because all this time she has never even called me, and I never knew her dad was the problem. Seems she is some kind of coward afraid of me. One time I had a dream that her dad was not a human but a used Israeli rifle that nobody wanted.

RE the dream about the American Indian mounds, at the time I had the dream, the academics scoffed at the theories of psychic Edgar Cayce (sometimes my dreams are psychic) that the moundbuilders of the US midwest were descended from people of ancient Atlantis and the Lost Tribes of Israel. But recently, starting in 1997, the scientific world has reduced its level of scorn re Cayce's belief that the moundbuilders of the midwestern US were descending from people of Atlantis and the Lost Tribes of Israel, as you can see from the following quotations:

At the conference Greg outlined Cayce's story of the Moundbuilders and their link with the Lost Tribes of Israel. Not too long after 10,000 B.C. according to Cayce, the Yucatan, Central Mexico, Southern California, Arizona, and New Mexico were fast becoming lands of mixed peoples from around the world. The Incas of Peru were also on the move, journeying north to join in the great Mayan development. According to Cayce, the remnants of Iltar's initial group from Atlantis also journeyed north to become the Mound Builders in the United States along the Mississippi and Ohio valleys. Around 3,000 B.C. Cayce asserted that remnants of the Lost Tribes of Israel also came to this area of the world. Coming first to the "southernmost portions" of the United States, the members of the "Lost Tribes" then moved to the Yucatan merging with the groups already established there. Sometime later, this mixture of people moved north into America eventually becoming the moundbuilders.

A number of academic archaeology textbooks rudely dismiss Edgar Cayce’s pronouncements about ancient history. Cayce was, to them, a “cult archaeologist” — unworthy of further investigation. The authors of those books, all scholars and archaeologists, claim that they have read Cayce’s readings and found them inaccurate, plagiarized, or filled with errors and bizarre claims. In Mound Builders, the authors begin by carefully evaluating the archaeologists’ “scientific” and scholarly assessments of Cayce. What is revealed is every bit as astounding as the claims made by Edgar Cayce himself. Nearly everything about Cayce put forth by the scholars in their books is an outright fabrication or a monumental blunder by these supposed scholars. When confronted by their obvious mistakes, the responses of two of the archaeologists showed how deeply divided their field is today. One fully admitted the mistakes and vowed to change his writings. Another arrogantly refused to change anything despite writing in his book he was dedicated to “truth.”

Despite the claims of archaeologists, the history of ancient America put forth in Edgar Cayce’s readings has never been tested. Edgar Cayce, America’s famous “Sleeping Prophet,” gave 68 “psychic readings” between 1925 to 1944 that provided information on America’s Mound Builders and ancient American history. These readings have never been thoroughly analyzed and have been largely forgotten. For the first time, Cayce’s statements about ancient America are genuinely compared to current archaeological evidence. The authors relate that they began with a skeptical point of view but the weight of the evidence eventually showed Cayce’s accuracy. Incredibly, nearly everything Cayce related about the Mound Builders and the patterns of migrations to ancient America is true.

Greg admitted that prior to 1997, virtually none of Cayce's statements about the moundbuilders or ancient American history could have been taken seriously. He also related his earlier skepticism regarding Cayce's outline of history simply because it completely contradicted known archaeological findings. However, since the collapse of the "Clovis First" theory in 1997, an astonishing series of finds have almost totally supported Cayce's statements. For example, 11 sites in the Americas have been dated before Clovis' 9500 B.C. date with several showing occupation dates at 50,000 B.C. Analysis of skulls found in the Americas show evidence of coming from Polynesia, Asia, China, Australia, and Europe.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

being a super-jogger, boyhood friends Danny and Tommy, and a flood; cauliflowers shrunk by the truth -- dreams

In the first dream, I was jogging, running, here and there at night, over hills, over fields, everywhere; I had somehow become a very fast long distance runner-jogger (in real life my feet and calves hurt so much when I jog that I go slowly and improve slowly). Me and this other guy similar to me were running a long distance race at a speed that was almost sprinting, without tiring.

In the dream I was in an apartment with Danny R, a boyhood friend who is now a very big shot in academia. Danny R looked and acted the way the AAA driver who towed my car to the mechanic looked and acted. The AAA driver looked and acted like the Mexicans in the old black and white cowboy movies. I could just see him with bandoliers across his chest. He was from Guatemala, and as I guessed it, a cowboy. He was proud of being Guatemalan, not Mexican. He was about six feet tall, very thin, macho, energetic, hustling, yet he smiled a good amount of the time. I told him he was a classic hombre and he agreed, yes, he was a "hombre"! "Hombre! Hombre!" He liked the word. In the dream Danny R and me were sitting on a couch, and Danny was standing there, all wrapped up in winter clothes and a winter hat. He was going to go out and get a few milligrams of cocaine and then return (maybe the stuff should be to at least some extent legalized). My job was to sit there and wait for him. I was thinking, when I awoke, aside from the legality of it, people who enjoy hanging out in a brotherly way with their male friends, have become a rarity, and the rarity of it seems to be at least as big a problem as cocaine consumption.

In this dream there was a segment about Tommy W. Tommy W is a guy from my high school, who is at least part jewish, who in the past I have said respectful things about. I used to think that in some ways Tommy W compared to the Massachussetts townies is like a human compared to apes. In the dream he was acting sinister, metallic, threatening. He said something threatening to me. The expression on his face was the Dan Senor facial expression. He seemed like a life size representation of a human made out of a sheet of metal that was slightly curved in one direction, like a slightly curved piece of paper, in a couple of places in the head. It got to the point where I would go out of my way to avoid running into him. I described him in the dream with a word that I thought I would be able to remember when I got up in the morning but in the morning I could not remember the word. In real life when I showed up at his place unannounced by a prior phone call, I stayed there for a few minutes I was really sweaty because it was a hot day with the air conditioner in the car not working. After that when I called him once or twice his wife would talk in an Indian accent and pretend it was not the Wolf residence. Likewise once when I called Cathy K who was half jewish from the high school I went to on the phone once, she hung up before I could announce who I even was.

In the dream in the end segment it was night and this pathway leading to a tent on a hillock about ten feet high had become flooded with water the water reached almost to the top of the tent. I had been sitting on the hillock near the tent when the flood occurred. Sitting on the hillock, also, was a local short fat black USA woman. As the flood climbed up the hillock I waded into it thinking I would be able to simply wade my way home. The water was about waist high. As I waded into the water some creature in the water got my penis in its mouth but did not bite or harm me; and there was flotsam and jetsam floating in the water, and I quickly retreated from the water.

In the second dream I had last night, I saw about ten yards away these cauliflowers in all different colors. The cauliflowers were something between the size of a golf ball and the size of a tennis ball. One was bright red, another yellow, another blue, seemed about 20 distinctly different colors were represented. These cauliflowers were such, that the truth being told shrank them in size. Near the cauliflowers there was also a steel frying pan with ground pork on one side of it. The truth being told had the effect of making the ground pork slide across the pan and sizzle with heat.

Dream: HL & LW visit Chicago without me, HL unfaithful?

In the dream, (non-melatonin night) HL & LW took a trip to Chicago together. HL & LW were discussed in a previous blog-post in this blog. HL &LW are that type that is considered a goddess amongst those who revere pretty, muscular, wide, stocky, big muscled, yet feminine-shaped and shapely, extremely busty women. The busty amazons and Glamazons cults revere such women.

My individual version of such goddess-cultism, which is a cultism that is often nothing more than shameless-auto-eroticism, is that such women can be goddesses when rituals are performed with them so that as a result the sexual passion the initiated male (myself) feels for them will not incur the wrath of God, and so that, as a result of the sexual passion in the initiate (myself) being soaked up by ritualized God-approved sex with the goddesses, the initiate's (myself) mind becomes emptied of sexual passions that are not God-approved.

This may be hard to believe, but at least my version of it, and probably other versions of it, involves legalistic attention being paid to religious ritual and government laws. What shall we call my particular version of the neo-courtly-love cults? Whatever you call it, say neo-semi-authoritarian-ritualism, the point is that the woman involved becomes a goddess, because she is the vehicle whereby the initiate distances himself from sexual passions that God does not approve of. The force of the ritual the initiate performs with the goddess, turns the goddess into something for which the initiate's sexual passion is approved of. The sexiness of the goddess is transformed from something that is a powerful force for the production of illicit lust into a powerful force that helps the initiate distance himself from illicit lust, by virtue of the power of the rituals performed.

In real life: HL & LW both, of whom in reality appearance-wise are of the pretty-busty-amazon tribe, said to me, "I do"...LW got extremely excited once while walking by me. She has smiled at me a couple of times....HL also said to me once, "I f___"...I didnt even answer them when they said these things to me as they worked behind checkout or service counters...I saw them walking somewhere together once.

In the dream:

HL & LW went together on a visit to Chicago. They went to Chicago together without me. It has been a day-dream for me for a long time, akin to the jewish dreams of visiting Jerusalem, for me to visit Chicago, where I spent my boyhood governed by an idealistic liberal-democrat government, with Glamazons such as HL & LW. But in the night-dream, they visited Chicago without me. Then they went somewhere else.

I visited Chicago after they did. In Chicago I saw my brother lying down on the ground, lying on his side, in the foetal position, on the flat, light-brown colored, sand-like earth. I noticed more than I usually do, how aside from the aesthetic good points of his face, sometimes his face looks a little too large, childish and brutal. He was frowning. He told me that he did not have any friends. I was thinking to myself what about this girlfriend he had been talking about.

My brother was perhaps, lying on the ground in this huge barn like room, with an earth floor. It was like some kind of farm states giant agricultural convention hall marketplace storage area. But this huge hall was filled with stalls, each about the size of a long narrow kitchen in an apartment. Most of these stalls contained basically a kitchen and nothing else. One of the stalls represented the apartment my brother lives in. There were about a half dozen white females in it, who were smiling. They felt friendly with regards to my brother. I did not know any of them. They were adult young women, white race, mostly wavy yellow haired, close to average height and build, their faces looked such that you could not tell whether the yellow in the hair was faked. They were not the prettiest type but they were not ugly or below average in terms of their face either. They seemed like nice rural midwestern blonde types.

There in Chicago I heard some rumor that HL, but not LW, had had sex with my brother, while she visited Chicago. My brother was claiming that this was true. In the dream HL was my wife and-or girl-friend and I felt angry at my brother for having had sex with her and for claiming he had had sex with her, and I felt angry with HL for having had sex with my brother, I felt she was polluting everything by turning sex into a charity she passed out to those that she pitied....I knew that with me it was real emotion and passion but I was sure with my brother it was a bizarre form of charity. I felt the proper setup was me having more than one wife with both of them loyal to me alone.

I interrogated my brother re HL's physical characteristics to find out if he was telling the truth. How big was her [DELETED] hair patch? He reported it to be smaller than it was in actuality. How long were her breasts? I held my arm out, he said they equaled the distance from the armpit to the knuckles on the outstretched arm....I knew they were significantly longer than that...I began to doubt his story.

@2005 David Virgil Hobbs

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Dream about the exciting little boys with big feet

I had two little dreams last night. I remembered them both when I woke up in the middle of the night, I thought I would be able to remember them both in the morning, but, in the morning, I could only remember the second one.

In the day it was daylight outside, a cloudy day, and Pond St., the street that I live on, had a bunch of little boy-men on it. There must have been 12-20 of these boy-men standing here and there on and near Pond St. They were not in any kind of formation; they stood there, one here one there, in a seemingly irregular random formation. In my field of view, looking out on Pond St. from the rear of a parking lot that is about 15 yards deep, I saw 12 to 20 of them here and there. They were all 2-3 feet tall, and had big, men's size feet, in gray-blue sneakers. There feet were big; their feet were larger than the feet of an average adult male. Their upper bodies, however, were the size and the approximate proportions of a child about 2-3 feet in height. They all had normal for a boy length straight black hair, I did not see any of their faces. They were looking this way and that so I did not see their faces. They all had strong, muscular, non-fat upper bodies; I could see this through the loose white long sleeved India Indian "Khurta" style shirts they wore. They had the classic weightlifter's V-shaped upper body, large muscular shoulder and back muscles; their torso was fairly long compared to their legs so their upper bodies were like a long as opposed to a short V-shape. They all wore dark colored loose long pants. Their bodies were shaped like little boys except it seems that their torsos or upper bodies were longer than most people's upper bodies and longer than my own. They were very muscular compared to boys their size, but their shape was not quite as adult as the strongest most muscular adult body-builders.

In the dream as people or objects encountered these boys, the people and objects that encountered them would undergo a transformation in reaction to these boys that they encountered. There was this idea in the air, that these boys caused and forced these reactions in these people/objects. In contradiction to this idea in the air, my idea, was that these boys set in motion forces that made the reactions the people/objects experienced possible but not unavoidable. I felt the boys produced a situation where the reaction people-objects were experiencing to the boys, was an option on their part and not something forced on them.

I witnessed one reaction of an object/person to these boys. I saw a silverish colored cooking pan with a handle, that had an object wrapped in white cloth on its cooking surface, wedged against (from the viewer's point of view) the uppermost edge of the circular cooking surface. This package of white cloth looked approximately the size and shape of an envelope that is not as wide as the usual envelope, but it was not as flat and rectangular and pointy as an envelope. In reaction to an encounter with these boys, a piece of bacon slid out of this white cloth envelope, and slid across the pan, gradually sliding down out of the white envelope and sliding down the pan towards the opposite edge of the pan (I saw the pan from a point about ten feet above it). This piece of bacon was parallel to the bottom edge of my field of view as it was sliding towards. It was a piece of bacon, but it was also a long white female breast. It represented a tubular shaped breast about 9 inches in diameter and about 4.5 feet long. It sizzled as it slid down the pan. This piece-of-bacon/breast, sliding out of the white cloth envelope and sliding down the pan, was a reaction this cooking pan and the stuff in had when this cooking pan and cloth envelope and the bacon-breast inside of it encountered these boys.

Seems the idea in the air was that these boys were guilty of causing passionate reactions such as sizzling in objects like female breasts; however, in contradiction to this idea, my idea, was that encounters with these boys made these reactions possible, but not inevitable, since I felt the object-persons that encountered these boys were able to prevent themselves from reactions such as sizzling breasts through the exercise of their own self-control.