Senator Billy Jo Blather's New Year's Day Address
Senator Billy Jo Blather's New Year's Day Address
Published: January 1, 2005
By: Senator Billy Jo Blather
Source: The Office of Senator Billy Jo Blather
Mr. Blather. M _. President, Colleagues an' feller Amerikin countrymen: fine mo'nin' an' happy noo year t'all of yo'! Fry mah hide! Today we welcome th' beginnin' of a noo year--th' 229th year of th' United States of Amerika. As th' noo year unfolds, less pray fo' th' peace an' prosperity of our nashun, an' less take a moment t'refleck on our past indeavo's an' invishun our future oppo'tunities.
Yessuh, Ah's a proud Leo-cornservative, though Ah admit sartin of mah Leo-cornservative colleagues cornsider me a bit eccentric. Whutevah our differences, we is proud of our superio' leonine, lion like form of cornservativism, as in Leos in astrology, known as "Leo-cornservativism". It was us, th' Leoconservatives, who back in th' days of th' Gipper, back in 1986, pushed through th' stinger missiles aid package thet established th' Taliban Al Qaeda Mujahidin as th' powers thet evicked th' Russians fum Afghanistan, as enny fool kin plainly see.
It was th' liberal democrats at th' CIA who did not be hankerin' t'give th' Taliban Al Qaeda Mujahideen th' stingers, an' who wanted t'be cheap wif them an' limit th' amount of weapons they got to a level far below whut we th' Lecons were junerously willin' t'give t'th' Al Qaeda Taliban Mujahidin resistance of Afganistan thet were freedom fighters fightin' the red russian soviets.
Us Leocons is th' ones who built th' Al Qaeda Taliban Mujahidin into th' monstrous threat it has become, as evidenced by their ho'rible 2001 attacks on us at th' Wo'ld Trade Center. Us Leocons created this hyar monster, thet is now the dawgoned-est most dangerous threat thet th' US has faced in histo'y. An' so we is proud t'ax yo' fo' yer continued suppo't, so thet in th' future we may create mo'e pow'ful allies thet will turn on us an' become th' most serious threats our nashuns has evah faced in histo'y.
Then we will be able t'replay th' glo'ious histo'y we prodooced while we wawked hard t'turn Al Qaeda Taliban an' Mujahidin into superpowers, thet glo'ious histo'y of economic growth through tax cuts, which led t'deficits which led t'money bein' bo'rowed fum fo'eigners, which grew th' economah, which led t'th' worship of more tax cuts, which led t'more deficits an' more bo'rowin', producin' th' fabulous economic miracle we rightly take credit fo'.
Yo' kin count on us t'install th' Hegelsoft 2.4 program, th' secret sof'ware through which, we establish our power, by empowerin' groups t'be useful tools of ours, an' which then turn aginst us t'be the dawgoned-est dangerous inemies we have evah faced.
Eff'n we ourselves is th' source of the dawgoned-est most dangerous threats we haf evah faced, an' we ourselves is th' ones in charge of th' response t'these threats, then it is, haids Ah win tails yo' lose, a wise implementashun of Hegelian dockrine, as ennyone wif a Phd in Political Philosophy kin see.
We Lecons haf shown thet we is able t'lead th' govment into a state of complete he'pless surprise regardin' huge terro'ist attacks thet haf been carried out on us by these groups thet we haf prodooced thet is the dawgoned-est most dangerous threats we haf evah faced.
We is able t'be caught completely off guard by attacks by these Ole Man Frankensteins we haf created. Tharfo'e yo' kin count on us, t'in th' future be completely caught off guard by other terrible Ole Man Frankensteins thet we prodooce thet then turn upon us. Better than thet, yo' kin count on us, t'prodooce Ole Man Frankensteins thet become a terrible threat t'us, an' thet we hafta spend trillions of dollars fightin' in hi-casualty (not lo-cal) wars.
Whut in tarnation'd yo' prefer, fightin' Draculas thet we did not ourselves create, o' fightin' Ole Man Frankensteins thet we ourselves haf created? On account o' we yer wise neocons prodooce th' Ole Man Frankensteins thet we fight, we haf th' advantage thet th' Ole Man Frankensteins we fight, is like psychopathic sons to us, like fambly. All in th' fambly. Such is th' junius of th' Hegelian dialeckic as expressed in th' noo secret sof'ware Hegelsoft 2.4.
It is on account o' we knows these Ole Man Frankensteins we haf created so well, thet is th' reason we is able t'be caught completely off guard an' surprised flat footed when they turn on us an' attack us. Thet is whuffo' we is surprised when they haf built up th' ability t'devastate us. As a result we ind up fightin' ho'rible Ole Man Frankensteins thet we ourselves haf created by givin' these Ole Man Frankenteins billions of dollars an' billions wo'th of weapons. An' so we fight thet which we ourselves have created, empowered an' funded, which is th' opptimal outcome as one kin see usin' th' noo Hegelsoft 2.4 sof'ware. An' if sech does not become plain t'yo' usin' Hegelsoft 2.4, yo' might cornsider takin' a few Phd level courses in philosophy. then agin eff'n yer astrologically speakin' not a Leo, yo' might simply lack th' God-given ability t'unnerstan'.
@2004 David Virgil Hobbs
Published: January 1, 2005
By: Senator Billy Jo Blather
Source: The Office of Senator Billy Jo Blather
Mr. Blather. M _. President, Colleagues an' feller Amerikin countrymen: fine mo'nin' an' happy noo year t'all of yo'! Fry mah hide! Today we welcome th' beginnin' of a noo year--th' 229th year of th' United States of Amerika. As th' noo year unfolds, less pray fo' th' peace an' prosperity of our nashun, an' less take a moment t'refleck on our past indeavo's an' invishun our future oppo'tunities.
Yessuh, Ah's a proud Leo-cornservative, though Ah admit sartin of mah Leo-cornservative colleagues cornsider me a bit eccentric. Whutevah our differences, we is proud of our superio' leonine, lion like form of cornservativism, as in Leos in astrology, known as "Leo-cornservativism". It was us, th' Leoconservatives, who back in th' days of th' Gipper, back in 1986, pushed through th' stinger missiles aid package thet established th' Taliban Al Qaeda Mujahidin as th' powers thet evicked th' Russians fum Afghanistan, as enny fool kin plainly see.
It was th' liberal democrats at th' CIA who did not be hankerin' t'give th' Taliban Al Qaeda Mujahideen th' stingers, an' who wanted t'be cheap wif them an' limit th' amount of weapons they got to a level far below whut we th' Lecons were junerously willin' t'give t'th' Al Qaeda Taliban Mujahidin resistance of Afganistan thet were freedom fighters fightin' the red russian soviets.
Us Leocons is th' ones who built th' Al Qaeda Taliban Mujahidin into th' monstrous threat it has become, as evidenced by their ho'rible 2001 attacks on us at th' Wo'ld Trade Center. Us Leocons created this hyar monster, thet is now the dawgoned-est most dangerous threat thet th' US has faced in histo'y. An' so we is proud t'ax yo' fo' yer continued suppo't, so thet in th' future we may create mo'e pow'ful allies thet will turn on us an' become th' most serious threats our nashuns has evah faced in histo'y.
Then we will be able t'replay th' glo'ious histo'y we prodooced while we wawked hard t'turn Al Qaeda Taliban an' Mujahidin into superpowers, thet glo'ious histo'y of economic growth through tax cuts, which led t'deficits which led t'money bein' bo'rowed fum fo'eigners, which grew th' economah, which led t'th' worship of more tax cuts, which led t'more deficits an' more bo'rowin', producin' th' fabulous economic miracle we rightly take credit fo'.
Yo' kin count on us t'install th' Hegelsoft 2.4 program, th' secret sof'ware through which, we establish our power, by empowerin' groups t'be useful tools of ours, an' which then turn aginst us t'be the dawgoned-est dangerous inemies we have evah faced.
Eff'n we ourselves is th' source of the dawgoned-est most dangerous threats we haf evah faced, an' we ourselves is th' ones in charge of th' response t'these threats, then it is, haids Ah win tails yo' lose, a wise implementashun of Hegelian dockrine, as ennyone wif a Phd in Political Philosophy kin see.
We Lecons haf shown thet we is able t'lead th' govment into a state of complete he'pless surprise regardin' huge terro'ist attacks thet haf been carried out on us by these groups thet we haf prodooced thet is the dawgoned-est most dangerous threats we haf evah faced.
We is able t'be caught completely off guard by attacks by these Ole Man Frankensteins we haf created. Tharfo'e yo' kin count on us, t'in th' future be completely caught off guard by other terrible Ole Man Frankensteins thet we prodooce thet then turn upon us. Better than thet, yo' kin count on us, t'prodooce Ole Man Frankensteins thet become a terrible threat t'us, an' thet we hafta spend trillions of dollars fightin' in hi-casualty (not lo-cal) wars.
Whut in tarnation'd yo' prefer, fightin' Draculas thet we did not ourselves create, o' fightin' Ole Man Frankensteins thet we ourselves haf created? On account o' we yer wise neocons prodooce th' Ole Man Frankensteins thet we fight, we haf th' advantage thet th' Ole Man Frankensteins we fight, is like psychopathic sons to us, like fambly. All in th' fambly. Such is th' junius of th' Hegelian dialeckic as expressed in th' noo secret sof'ware Hegelsoft 2.4.
It is on account o' we knows these Ole Man Frankensteins we haf created so well, thet is th' reason we is able t'be caught completely off guard an' surprised flat footed when they turn on us an' attack us. Thet is whuffo' we is surprised when they haf built up th' ability t'devastate us. As a result we ind up fightin' ho'rible Ole Man Frankensteins thet we ourselves haf created by givin' these Ole Man Frankenteins billions of dollars an' billions wo'th of weapons. An' so we fight thet which we ourselves have created, empowered an' funded, which is th' opptimal outcome as one kin see usin' th' noo Hegelsoft 2.4 sof'ware. An' if sech does not become plain t'yo' usin' Hegelsoft 2.4, yo' might cornsider takin' a few Phd level courses in philosophy. then agin eff'n yer astrologically speakin' not a Leo, yo' might simply lack th' God-given ability t'unnerstan'.
@2004 David Virgil Hobbs
posted by David Virgil at 4:44 PM
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