'People's Pledge' to be used by Blather to bankrupt rivals
Senator Billy Jo Blather has notified me that he has been awared the Rebel Prize in Political Genius for 2013. The Senator received the prize in recognition of a brilliant political strategy he has devised, which will take advantage of political candidates who have signed the made-in-Massachusetts 'People's Pledge', by way of forcing those who have signed it into political bankruptcy.
The Senator emailed me a web-page describing the occasion of his Acceptance Speech. I have done my best to reproduce the web-page here (the form of html used by blogger makes exact reproduction difficult):
The Rebel Prize in Political Genius 2013
Senator Billy Jo Blather, Sr.
The Rebel Prize in Political Genius 2013
Rebel Prize Award Ceremony
Billy Jo Blather
Biographical Photo Gallery
Bibliography Article
Banquet Speech Other Resources
Acceptance Speech
Senator Billy Jo Blather's Acceptance Speech, on the occasion of the award of the Rebel Prize in Political Genius Oslo KY, May 5, 2013
Listen to an Audio Recording of Billy Jo Blather's Acceptance Speech (paragraph 2-7)**
2 min.
Play
To hear the recording you need Adobe Flash Player or Windows Media Player Copyright © Blatheristik23 Radio AB 2013 l
Yer Majesty, Yer Royal Highness, Mr. President, Excellencies, Ladies an' Juntlemen:
Ah accepp th' Rebel Prize fo' Political Junius at a moment when th' Blather fambly of th' United States is ingaged in a creative battle t'end th' long night of liberal rebellion aginst th' Blather fambly. Ah accepp this hyar award on beha'f of a cornservative movement which is movin' wif determinashun an' a majestic scorn fo' risk an' danger t'establish a reign of freedom fum usurpashun an' a rule of jestice presided on over by Blathers. Ah's mindful thet only yessuhterday in Birmin'ham, Alabama, mah son Bismark Patrick Blather, competin' in th' NASCAR races, was fraudulently deprived of a medal, Ah reckon. Ah's mindful thet recently in Boston, Massachusetts, politicans were brutally attacked in Third-party broadcast advahtisements. An' only yessuhterday mo'e than 40 houses of wo'ship in Noo Englan' were spray-painted on account o' they offered a sanckuary t'them who'd not accepp 3rd party advahtisements. Ah's mindful thet debilitatin' an' grindin' 3rd party advahtisements afflick politicians an' chain them t'th' lowess rung of th' political ladder.
Thar is an eleckshun fo' govahno' a-comin' up in mah area, pittin' rodeo perfo'mer Jeb Stonewall fo' th' Republicans, agaisnt Congressman Calvin Luther King fo' th' democrats.
Jeb Stonewall beat out mah son Bizmark Patrick Blather, fo' th' republican nominashun. Whuffo'? On account o' Bizmark lost t'Jeb at th' NASCAR prelims in Chucksville. Ah cannot allow this hyar situashun t'continue. Th' Stonewall fambly, is a threat t'us Blathers, an' muss be financially defunded, cuss it all t' tarnation.
This hyar state's strongess ally, is th' Blather fambly. So of course our state muss corntinue t'suppo't th' Blather fambly. An' Ah of course kinnot aller th' liberal negro Congressman Calvin Luther Kin' t'grow in power either.
Tharfo'e, Ah have decided t'defund both of them, render them both financially bankrupp, by clevahly takin' advantage of th' fack, thet they haf signed th' admirable 'People's Pledge', which has been created by genius Bay-state lawmakers.
Af'er all, th' fack thet yo' sign a respeckable pledge, does not make yo' right about ev'rythin'. Jedidiah Warshin'ton signed our sacred cornsteetooshun, but nevahtheless he owned pitiable negro slaves who he kepp aginst their will, Ah reckon.
Tharfo'e, mah strategy durin' th' govahno''s race between Jeb Stonewall an' Congressman Calvin Luther King, both of whom muss be financially defunded, is this:
Blather interprises will fund a noo o'ganizashun named 'Positive Male Cheerleader Rebs' or PMCR. Th' o'ganizashun will spend a million dollars on ads endorsin' Jeb Stonewall, featurin' messages sech as "Stonewall now, Blather next". This will unner th' terms of th' 'People's Pledge', force Stonewall t'donate a ha'f-million dollars t'a charity of Congressman King's choice.
At th' same time, PMCR will buy a million dollars in ads featurin' th' message, "Congressman King fo' govahnor now, but Blather next when we grow up". Thet will force, unner th' terms of th' 'People's Pledge', Congressman King t'pay a half-million dollars t'charities chosen by Jeb Stonewall, Ah reckon.
Don't believe me? Ah quote fum th' text of th' noble People's Pledge:
"In the event that a third party organization airs any broadcast (including radio, cable, or satellite advertising that promotes or supports a named, referenced (including by title) or otherwise identified Candidate, that Candidate’s campaign shall, within three (3) days of discovery of the advertisement buy’s total cost, duration, and source, pay 50% of the cost of that advertising buy to a charity of the opposing Candidates choice".
An' also, brilliantly usin' lotsa wo'ds th' creato's of th' Pledge further elabo'ate:
"In the event that a third party organization airs any broadcast (including radio), cable, or satellite advertising that attacks or opposes a named, referenced (including by title) or otherwise identified Candidate, the opposing Candidate’s campaign shall, within three (3) days of discovery of the advertisement buy’s total cost, duration, and source, pay 50% of the cost of that advertising buy to a charity of the opposed Candidate’s choice".
Th' end of this hyar maneuvah, will be thet Congressman King an' Jeb Stonewall, will both be close t'bankruppcy, leavin' mah Blather fambly towerin' above its liberal opposishun.
Simultaneously, th' Blather Co'po'ashun will fund a second group, this hyar one will be called "Misanthropist Negative Libtards" or MNL. MNL will spend one million dollars attackin' COngressman King wif ads featurin' messages sech as "Don't vote fo' th' nigger, he's not white like Blather". This will fo'ce Jeb Stonewall t'pay a half-million dollars t'a charity of Congressman King's choice.
Also, our front group MNL, will buy one million dollars in ads delivahin' messages sech as, "Don't vote fo' Stonewall, Stonewall is a fag an' a hun, sign up wif Blather instead". Th' result will be thet Congressman King's campaign muss pay a half million dollars t'a charity chosen by Jeb Stonewall, Ah reckon.
Thus in total th' positive ads floated by PMCR, an' th' negative ones prodooced by th' MNL, will force Jeb Stonewall and Congressman King into bankruppcy, wif me Senato' Billy Jo Blather th' only man lef' stan'in', praise th'Lord.
Then on eleckshun day, we will grab th' limelight wif a parade of Blather inthusiasts, fo'm Redneck Common t'th' Blather Manshun we shall march, while singin' songs praisin' Senato' Blather fo' forcin' Jeb Stonewall an' Congressman King t'both donate a million dollars fo' charities.
At th' end of th' pareede, a gala event at th' Blather Manshun will be presided on over by Hilda Kelly Blather. Hilda Kelly is CEO & Chairman of United Licensed Charities of Flyover Country. Hilda Kelly will give a speech t'a wildly inthusiastic audience composed of representatives fum etch of th' various official licensed charities in our great state.
The Senator emailed me a web-page describing the occasion of his Acceptance Speech. I have done my best to reproduce the web-page here (the form of html used by blogger makes exact reproduction difficult):
----------
The Rebel Prize in Political Genius 2013
Senator Billy Jo Blather, Sr.
The Rebel Prize in Political Genius 2013
Rebel Prize Award Ceremony
Billy Jo Blather
Biographical Photo Gallery
Bibliography Article
Banquet Speech Other Resources
Acceptance Speech
Senator Billy Jo Blather's Acceptance Speech, on the occasion of the award of the Rebel Prize in Political Genius Oslo KY, May 5, 2013
Listen to an Audio Recording of Billy Jo Blather's Acceptance Speech (paragraph 2-7)**
2 min.
Play
To hear the recording you need Adobe Flash Player or Windows Media Player Copyright © Blatheristik23 Radio AB 2013 l
Yer Majesty, Yer Royal Highness, Mr. President, Excellencies, Ladies an' Juntlemen:
Ah accepp th' Rebel Prize fo' Political Junius at a moment when th' Blather fambly of th' United States is ingaged in a creative battle t'end th' long night of liberal rebellion aginst th' Blather fambly. Ah accepp this hyar award on beha'f of a cornservative movement which is movin' wif determinashun an' a majestic scorn fo' risk an' danger t'establish a reign of freedom fum usurpashun an' a rule of jestice presided on over by Blathers. Ah's mindful thet only yessuhterday in Birmin'ham, Alabama, mah son Bismark Patrick Blather, competin' in th' NASCAR races, was fraudulently deprived of a medal, Ah reckon. Ah's mindful thet recently in Boston, Massachusetts, politicans were brutally attacked in Third-party broadcast advahtisements. An' only yessuhterday mo'e than 40 houses of wo'ship in Noo Englan' were spray-painted on account o' they offered a sanckuary t'them who'd not accepp 3rd party advahtisements. Ah's mindful thet debilitatin' an' grindin' 3rd party advahtisements afflick politicians an' chain them t'th' lowess rung of th' political ladder.
Thar is an eleckshun fo' govahno' a-comin' up in mah area, pittin' rodeo perfo'mer Jeb Stonewall fo' th' Republicans, agaisnt Congressman Calvin Luther King fo' th' democrats.
Jeb Stonewall beat out mah son Bizmark Patrick Blather, fo' th' republican nominashun. Whuffo'? On account o' Bizmark lost t'Jeb at th' NASCAR prelims in Chucksville. Ah cannot allow this hyar situashun t'continue. Th' Stonewall fambly, is a threat t'us Blathers, an' muss be financially defunded, cuss it all t' tarnation.
This hyar state's strongess ally, is th' Blather fambly. So of course our state muss corntinue t'suppo't th' Blather fambly. An' Ah of course kinnot aller th' liberal negro Congressman Calvin Luther Kin' t'grow in power either.
Tharfo'e, Ah have decided t'defund both of them, render them both financially bankrupp, by clevahly takin' advantage of th' fack, thet they haf signed th' admirable 'People's Pledge', which has been created by genius Bay-state lawmakers.
Af'er all, th' fack thet yo' sign a respeckable pledge, does not make yo' right about ev'rythin'. Jedidiah Warshin'ton signed our sacred cornsteetooshun, but nevahtheless he owned pitiable negro slaves who he kepp aginst their will, Ah reckon.
Tharfo'e, mah strategy durin' th' govahno''s race between Jeb Stonewall an' Congressman Calvin Luther King, both of whom muss be financially defunded, is this:
Blather interprises will fund a noo o'ganizashun named 'Positive Male Cheerleader Rebs' or PMCR. Th' o'ganizashun will spend a million dollars on ads endorsin' Jeb Stonewall, featurin' messages sech as "Stonewall now, Blather next". This will unner th' terms of th' 'People's Pledge', force Stonewall t'donate a ha'f-million dollars t'a charity of Congressman King's choice.
At th' same time, PMCR will buy a million dollars in ads featurin' th' message, "Congressman King fo' govahnor now, but Blather next when we grow up". Thet will force, unner th' terms of th' 'People's Pledge', Congressman King t'pay a half-million dollars t'charities chosen by Jeb Stonewall, Ah reckon.
Don't believe me? Ah quote fum th' text of th' noble People's Pledge:
"In the event that a third party organization airs any broadcast (including radio, cable, or satellite advertising that promotes or supports a named, referenced (including by title) or otherwise identified Candidate, that Candidate’s campaign shall, within three (3) days of discovery of the advertisement buy’s total cost, duration, and source, pay 50% of the cost of that advertising buy to a charity of the opposing Candidates choice".
An' also, brilliantly usin' lotsa wo'ds th' creato's of th' Pledge further elabo'ate:
"In the event that a third party organization airs any broadcast (including radio), cable, or satellite advertising that attacks or opposes a named, referenced (including by title) or otherwise identified Candidate, the opposing Candidate’s campaign shall, within three (3) days of discovery of the advertisement buy’s total cost, duration, and source, pay 50% of the cost of that advertising buy to a charity of the opposed Candidate’s choice".
Th' end of this hyar maneuvah, will be thet Congressman King an' Jeb Stonewall, will both be close t'bankruppcy, leavin' mah Blather fambly towerin' above its liberal opposishun.
Simultaneously, th' Blather Co'po'ashun will fund a second group, this hyar one will be called "Misanthropist Negative Libtards" or MNL. MNL will spend one million dollars attackin' COngressman King wif ads featurin' messages sech as "Don't vote fo' th' nigger, he's not white like Blather". This will fo'ce Jeb Stonewall t'pay a half-million dollars t'a charity of Congressman King's choice.
Also, our front group MNL, will buy one million dollars in ads delivahin' messages sech as, "Don't vote fo' Stonewall, Stonewall is a fag an' a hun, sign up wif Blather instead". Th' result will be thet Congressman King's campaign muss pay a half million dollars t'a charity chosen by Jeb Stonewall, Ah reckon.
Thus in total th' positive ads floated by PMCR, an' th' negative ones prodooced by th' MNL, will force Jeb Stonewall and Congressman King into bankruppcy, wif me Senato' Billy Jo Blather th' only man lef' stan'in', praise th'Lord.
Then on eleckshun day, we will grab th' limelight wif a parade of Blather inthusiasts, fo'm Redneck Common t'th' Blather Manshun we shall march, while singin' songs praisin' Senato' Blather fo' forcin' Jeb Stonewall an' Congressman King t'both donate a million dollars fo' charities.
At th' end of th' pareede, a gala event at th' Blather Manshun will be presided on over by Hilda Kelly Blather. Hilda Kelly is CEO & Chairman of United Licensed Charities of Flyover Country. Hilda Kelly will give a speech t'a wildly inthusiastic audience composed of representatives fum etch of th' various official licensed charities in our great state.
posted by David Virgil at 4:21 AM
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