Blather defends war on terror as promotion of peace and freedom
For Immediate Release
Office of the Press Secretary
November 17, 2005
Senator Blather Urges USA to continue on crusade to bring peace and freedom and the elimination of terrorists to the world
Hilda Kelly Blather Executive Office Building
Room 667
5:41 A.M. EDT
Senator Blather--We is gittin rid of freedom an' democracy in our nashun, an' buildin' up th' economah of dangerous hono'able fo'eign nashuns thet haf killed hundreds of thousan's of us, an' failin' t'secure our bo'ders, on account o' this hyar is th' only way t' replace th' dangerous Islamic threat, wif peace an' freedom in th' wo'ld. (Applause.)
Hell, th' nashuns thet is gittin' our money haf killed ten thousan' Amerikinsfo' ev'ry Amerikin killed by dangerous Islamists. This hyar shows thet they is mo'e able t' control th' terro'ists than we are, so let them haf th' money, bein' inslaved by these hono'able fo'eign nashuns is better than bein' inslaved by th' evil Islamists, on account o' th' evil Islamists'd ban alcoholic bevahages sech as Jim Beam bourbon likker which we all love, an' God is love. (Applause.) Th' evil Islamic assassins were a hashish smokin' cult, an' we is at war wif drugs like Hashish on account o' we are in a war on drugs. Plus thar is alot of pot smokin' in th' evil Islamist lan's. (Applause.)
Jest as our brave soldiers is proud t'sacrifice their lives in th' war on terro', so also we sh'd be proud t'sacrifice our nashun in th' war on terro'. Thus we fade away, an' allow fo'eigners better than us t'replace us in th' wawrld, on account o' these fo'eigners who replace us, will does a better job than us of fightin' th' evil Islamo-terro'ists. (Applause.)
We does away wif freedom an' democracy at home, thet we may spread freedom an' democracy abroad. Like brave soldiers, we sh'd be proud t'sacrifice freedom an' democracy at home thet it may flourish abroad, jest as heroes give their lives thet others may live. Take a look at them troops in th' coffins. Thar is not much freedom bein' daid an' stuck in a coffin thet yo' kinnot git outta, yet these deceased heroes gave their lives thet others might be free. When we is free, we are too weak t'make others free. Look at how th' troops who give up their freedoms thet others might be free, is not free, but hafta take o'ders. Then we will does away wif th' freedom an' democracy we haf spread t'fo'eign lan's, so thet we kin use th' stren'th streamin' fum fascism, t'spread freedom an' democracy amongst th' Martians an' in th' ress of th' solar system, dawgone it. Af'er thet we will hafta git rid of freedom an' democracy in our solar system, so thet we can brin' freedom an' democracy t'th' ress of our galaxy. (Applause.)
Th' wo'ld will not knows true security, until one unopposed power corntrols th' entire wo'ld, tharfo'e let's fade away, that fo'eigners mo'e pow'ful an' bravah than us may become thet one power thet is able t'prodooce peace by corntrollin' ev'rythin' an' doin' away wif th' terro'ists. One of our greatess junerals, th' great Juneral Douglas Macarthur, said, "old soldiers do'nt die, they jest fade away"...so let's like old soldiers, fade away. (Laughter.)
On account o' we is chumps ourselves, lets face th' reality, thet th' choice is between th' fo'eign terro'ists takin' on over, an' th' respeckable hono'able fo'eigners who we are too afraid of t'call them a terro'ist or a rogue nashun takin' on over, an' let us hoof it down swinging', t'use th' wo'ds of th' great negro boxer, brin'in' down th' terro'ists while fadin' away allowin' th' fo'eigners we is too afraid of t' criticize t'replace us. (Applause.)
Ah quote fum th' conservative gospels recently unearthed by brilliant archaeologists, "Behold, an' obsarve th' possums, how they maintain a peckin' order like chickens"; an' so lets maintain th' internashunal peckin' o'der, brin'in' down th' terro'ists who is weaker than us, an' brin'in' down our nashun, which is weaker than us its elite, while deferrin' t'th' hono'able fo'eign powers we is polite wif on account o' we fear them, allowin' them t'take on over an' replace us. Th' peckin' order mentality is second nature t'us cornservatives due t'long experience in th' domestic economic arena, so we is especially fine fit t'brin' th' peckin' o'der to th' internashunal stage. (Applause.)
So long as thar is two powers in opposishun t'etch other in th' wo'ld, th' weaker of th' two is th' terro'ist an' th' rogue nashun, who sh'd be defeated by th' respeckable stronger power. So tharfo'e less brin' peace t'th' wo'ld, by eliminatin' ourselves, while gittin' rid of th' terro'ists. (Applause.)
Th' terro'ists, an' them who harbo' aid an' abet th' terro'ists is one an' th' same, equally guilty. Who is them thet harbo' aid an' abet th' terro'ists? They are us, th' liberal US of A as th' great singer Steve Miller called it, (Laughter.) as one kin clearly see lookin' at th' lyin' opinion polls, which is spreadin' th' lie, thet th' US of A is not wif us th' Leocons, in fightin' this hyar war. Tharfo'e, th' bess thin', is thet we sh'd be destroyed while in th' process th' terro'ists is also destroyed. (Applause.)
We need t'cut off th' circulashun of money in our nashun, we need t'strangle th' chain reackshun cuzd by th' cook buyin' fum th' carpenter who buys fum th' tailo' who buys fum th' docko' who buys fum th' skoo marm who buys fum th' dancer who buys fum th' cook ad nauseum ad infinitum in an indless liberal chain reackshun, on account o' this hyar chain reackshun allers terro'ist coddlin' liberals t'eat; we need t'cut off this hyar circulashun which allers cornservative terro'ist lovahrs t'make money off of th' liberal spendin'. (Applause.)
Eff'n we kin jest git rid of ourselves, while we git rid of th' Islamo-terro'ists, th' wo'ld will be safely ruled by th' esteemed fo'eigners who we is afraid t'call terro'ists o' rogue nashuns, they will haf no opposishun, they will rule ev'rythin', an' we will haf accomplished our goal of producin' lastin' peace by gittin' rid of ourselves th' terro'ists lovahs, an' also gittin' rid of th' terro'ists. (Applause.)
Ah have already reminded yo' in past speeches, that a war hero sacrifices his life fo' his nashun, an' so also we sh'd sacrifice our nashun fo' th' greater cuz of conservativism an' freedom fum taxes in th' world, so thet through our sacrifice of our nashun th' world kin injoy th' freedom of varmints who wawrk fo' free so employers is free fum th' burden of havin' t'pay them ennythin', an' so th' wo'ld can injoy th' freedom of bein' free fum taxes. Ah now remind yo' thet we sh'd also sacrifice our liberal nashun, white race, an' our Christendom, so th' wo'ld can live in peace an' freedom, competely corntrolled by esteemed fo'eigners, esteemed fo'eigners who fo' now is wisely tempo'arily peaceful so they kin lull us t'sleep an' rule a wo'ld at peace an' wifout terro' on account o' th' esteemd fo'eigners will haf no opposishun. (Applause.)
In o'der t'do away wif th' Islamic tero'ists while at th' same time doin' away wif us th' liberal USA that aids an' abets an' harbo's th' Islamic terro'ists, we need a free society thet is free of disobedience, same way operatin' rooms is free of germs. We need a free society whar soldiers who is not paid ennythin' fight fo' free an' wawkers wawfk fo' free. We need a free society whar wimmen is like prosteetootes who haf sex fo' free. Such a free society is a society which will be able t'smash th' terro'ists. Then af'er smashin' th' terro'ists it will collapse an' disappear as it sh'd, on account o' it is as bad as terro'ists on account o' it aids an' abets terro'ists by opposin' our Leoconservative crusades aginst terro'ists. While an' af'er smashin' th' terro'ists, it will collapse on account o' although it will be a free society thet is pow'ful on account o' it is free of disobedience an' ev'ryone wawrks fo' free, it will be a society thet corntains no facktories an' has no money inergy efficiency o' inergy an' has no ability t'git money outta fo'eign nashuns. Thus we will haf attained our goal of brin'in' freedom an' peace t'th' wo'ld, on account o' th' unopposed powerful group of respecked admirable fo'eigners will rule th' entire wo'ld, thar will be no terro'ists, an' th' wo'ld will be free of taxes, free of disobedience, an' ev'rybody will wawrk fo' free, which will free employers fum th' tyranny of havin' t'pay wawrkers. (Applause.)
Thus in th' end we will haf a free an' peaceful an' cornservative wo'ld, a wo'ld that no longer has us o' th' terro'ists in it. We an' th' Islamic terro'ists is th' greatess obstacles thet stan' in th' way of th' establishment of this hyar noo free an' peaceful world peckin' order. We an' th' terro'ists is both weaker than th' esteemed pow'ful fo'eigners, an' by definishun th' weaker of two opposin' groups vyin' fo' wo'ld corntrol is terro'ists an' rogues. All yo' hafta does t reckanize th' truth thet we is terro'ists, is take a look a th' articles writ by liberal liars who call us terro'ists. We an' th' terro'ists is th' greatess threats t'th' superio' athiess chosen varmints th' varmints dexcended fum th' jews who rejecked liberal Christianity. We an' th' terro'ists is th' ones who haf a histo'y of persecutin' this hyar superio' chosen varmints. We an' th' terro'ists is th' ones who interfere wif freedom fum taxes an' interfere wif ev'ryone wawrkin' fo' free an' interfere wif employers bein' free fum havin' t'pay wages, on account o' we is offended by th' wisdom of th' superio' chosen varmints. We argue wif their wise idea thet liberal Christianity is evil on account o' it interferes wif freedom fum disobedience, freedom fum havin' t'pay ennyone ennythin', an' freedom fum taxes. We argue wif their wise idea that thar is no God, we set up all these laws of God which result in taxes, an' in varmints havin' t'be paid t'wawrk, an' varmints bein' disobedient, an' varmints persecutin' noble tax cuttin' cornservative criminals. We are th' ones who by disagreein' wif th' chosen varmints's wise idea thet we is subhoomin, interfere wif freedom fum taxes an' freedom fum disobedience an' freedom fum havin' t'pay wawkers, an' freedom fum moral codes thet result in th' persecushun of noble tax cuttin' cornservative criminals. Thus we an' th' terro'ists have t'go so thet th' superio'race, th' atheist cornservative jews dexcended fum th' jews who rejecked liberal Christianity, kin live happily evah af'er as th' special pets of th' honrable esteemed pow'ful group of fo'eigners thet will rule th' wo'ld. (Standing Ovation.)
@2005 David Virgil Hobbs
Office of the Press Secretary
November 17, 2005
Senator Blather Urges USA to continue on crusade to bring peace and freedom and the elimination of terrorists to the world
Hilda Kelly Blather Executive Office Building
Room 667
5:41 A.M. EDT
Senator Blather--We is gittin rid of freedom an' democracy in our nashun, an' buildin' up th' economah of dangerous hono'able fo'eign nashuns thet haf killed hundreds of thousan's of us, an' failin' t'secure our bo'ders, on account o' this hyar is th' only way t' replace th' dangerous Islamic threat, wif peace an' freedom in th' wo'ld. (Applause.)
Hell, th' nashuns thet is gittin' our money haf killed ten thousan' Amerikinsfo' ev'ry Amerikin killed by dangerous Islamists. This hyar shows thet they is mo'e able t' control th' terro'ists than we are, so let them haf th' money, bein' inslaved by these hono'able fo'eign nashuns is better than bein' inslaved by th' evil Islamists, on account o' th' evil Islamists'd ban alcoholic bevahages sech as Jim Beam bourbon likker which we all love, an' God is love. (Applause.) Th' evil Islamic assassins were a hashish smokin' cult, an' we is at war wif drugs like Hashish on account o' we are in a war on drugs. Plus thar is alot of pot smokin' in th' evil Islamist lan's. (Applause.)
Jest as our brave soldiers is proud t'sacrifice their lives in th' war on terro', so also we sh'd be proud t'sacrifice our nashun in th' war on terro'. Thus we fade away, an' allow fo'eigners better than us t'replace us in th' wawrld, on account o' these fo'eigners who replace us, will does a better job than us of fightin' th' evil Islamo-terro'ists. (Applause.)
We does away wif freedom an' democracy at home, thet we may spread freedom an' democracy abroad. Like brave soldiers, we sh'd be proud t'sacrifice freedom an' democracy at home thet it may flourish abroad, jest as heroes give their lives thet others may live. Take a look at them troops in th' coffins. Thar is not much freedom bein' daid an' stuck in a coffin thet yo' kinnot git outta, yet these deceased heroes gave their lives thet others might be free. When we is free, we are too weak t'make others free. Look at how th' troops who give up their freedoms thet others might be free, is not free, but hafta take o'ders. Then we will does away wif th' freedom an' democracy we haf spread t'fo'eign lan's, so thet we kin use th' stren'th streamin' fum fascism, t'spread freedom an' democracy amongst th' Martians an' in th' ress of th' solar system, dawgone it. Af'er thet we will hafta git rid of freedom an' democracy in our solar system, so thet we can brin' freedom an' democracy t'th' ress of our galaxy. (Applause.)
Th' wo'ld will not knows true security, until one unopposed power corntrols th' entire wo'ld, tharfo'e let's fade away, that fo'eigners mo'e pow'ful an' bravah than us may become thet one power thet is able t'prodooce peace by corntrollin' ev'rythin' an' doin' away wif th' terro'ists. One of our greatess junerals, th' great Juneral Douglas Macarthur, said, "old soldiers do'nt die, they jest fade away"...so let's like old soldiers, fade away. (Laughter.)
On account o' we is chumps ourselves, lets face th' reality, thet th' choice is between th' fo'eign terro'ists takin' on over, an' th' respeckable hono'able fo'eigners who we are too afraid of t'call them a terro'ist or a rogue nashun takin' on over, an' let us hoof it down swinging', t'use th' wo'ds of th' great negro boxer, brin'in' down th' terro'ists while fadin' away allowin' th' fo'eigners we is too afraid of t' criticize t'replace us. (Applause.)
Ah quote fum th' conservative gospels recently unearthed by brilliant archaeologists, "Behold, an' obsarve th' possums, how they maintain a peckin' order like chickens"; an' so lets maintain th' internashunal peckin' o'der, brin'in' down th' terro'ists who is weaker than us, an' brin'in' down our nashun, which is weaker than us its elite, while deferrin' t'th' hono'able fo'eign powers we is polite wif on account o' we fear them, allowin' them t'take on over an' replace us. Th' peckin' order mentality is second nature t'us cornservatives due t'long experience in th' domestic economic arena, so we is especially fine fit t'brin' th' peckin' o'der to th' internashunal stage. (Applause.)
So long as thar is two powers in opposishun t'etch other in th' wo'ld, th' weaker of th' two is th' terro'ist an' th' rogue nashun, who sh'd be defeated by th' respeckable stronger power. So tharfo'e less brin' peace t'th' wo'ld, by eliminatin' ourselves, while gittin' rid of th' terro'ists. (Applause.)
Th' terro'ists, an' them who harbo' aid an' abet th' terro'ists is one an' th' same, equally guilty. Who is them thet harbo' aid an' abet th' terro'ists? They are us, th' liberal US of A as th' great singer Steve Miller called it, (Laughter.) as one kin clearly see lookin' at th' lyin' opinion polls, which is spreadin' th' lie, thet th' US of A is not wif us th' Leocons, in fightin' this hyar war. Tharfo'e, th' bess thin', is thet we sh'd be destroyed while in th' process th' terro'ists is also destroyed. (Applause.)
We need t'cut off th' circulashun of money in our nashun, we need t'strangle th' chain reackshun cuzd by th' cook buyin' fum th' carpenter who buys fum th' tailo' who buys fum th' docko' who buys fum th' skoo marm who buys fum th' dancer who buys fum th' cook ad nauseum ad infinitum in an indless liberal chain reackshun, on account o' this hyar chain reackshun allers terro'ist coddlin' liberals t'eat; we need t'cut off this hyar circulashun which allers cornservative terro'ist lovahrs t'make money off of th' liberal spendin'. (Applause.)
Eff'n we kin jest git rid of ourselves, while we git rid of th' Islamo-terro'ists, th' wo'ld will be safely ruled by th' esteemed fo'eigners who we is afraid t'call terro'ists o' rogue nashuns, they will haf no opposishun, they will rule ev'rythin', an' we will haf accomplished our goal of producin' lastin' peace by gittin' rid of ourselves th' terro'ists lovahs, an' also gittin' rid of th' terro'ists. (Applause.)
Ah have already reminded yo' in past speeches, that a war hero sacrifices his life fo' his nashun, an' so also we sh'd sacrifice our nashun fo' th' greater cuz of conservativism an' freedom fum taxes in th' world, so thet through our sacrifice of our nashun th' world kin injoy th' freedom of varmints who wawrk fo' free so employers is free fum th' burden of havin' t'pay them ennythin', an' so th' wo'ld can injoy th' freedom of bein' free fum taxes. Ah now remind yo' thet we sh'd also sacrifice our liberal nashun, white race, an' our Christendom, so th' wo'ld can live in peace an' freedom, competely corntrolled by esteemed fo'eigners, esteemed fo'eigners who fo' now is wisely tempo'arily peaceful so they kin lull us t'sleep an' rule a wo'ld at peace an' wifout terro' on account o' th' esteemd fo'eigners will haf no opposishun. (Applause.)
In o'der t'do away wif th' Islamic tero'ists while at th' same time doin' away wif us th' liberal USA that aids an' abets an' harbo's th' Islamic terro'ists, we need a free society thet is free of disobedience, same way operatin' rooms is free of germs. We need a free society whar soldiers who is not paid ennythin' fight fo' free an' wawkers wawfk fo' free. We need a free society whar wimmen is like prosteetootes who haf sex fo' free. Such a free society is a society which will be able t'smash th' terro'ists. Then af'er smashin' th' terro'ists it will collapse an' disappear as it sh'd, on account o' it is as bad as terro'ists on account o' it aids an' abets terro'ists by opposin' our Leoconservative crusades aginst terro'ists. While an' af'er smashin' th' terro'ists, it will collapse on account o' although it will be a free society thet is pow'ful on account o' it is free of disobedience an' ev'ryone wawrks fo' free, it will be a society thet corntains no facktories an' has no money inergy efficiency o' inergy an' has no ability t'git money outta fo'eign nashuns. Thus we will haf attained our goal of brin'in' freedom an' peace t'th' wo'ld, on account o' th' unopposed powerful group of respecked admirable fo'eigners will rule th' entire wo'ld, thar will be no terro'ists, an' th' wo'ld will be free of taxes, free of disobedience, an' ev'rybody will wawrk fo' free, which will free employers fum th' tyranny of havin' t'pay wawrkers. (Applause.)
Thus in th' end we will haf a free an' peaceful an' cornservative wo'ld, a wo'ld that no longer has us o' th' terro'ists in it. We an' th' Islamic terro'ists is th' greatess obstacles thet stan' in th' way of th' establishment of this hyar noo free an' peaceful world peckin' order. We an' th' terro'ists is both weaker than th' esteemed pow'ful fo'eigners, an' by definishun th' weaker of two opposin' groups vyin' fo' wo'ld corntrol is terro'ists an' rogues. All yo' hafta does t reckanize th' truth thet we is terro'ists, is take a look a th' articles writ by liberal liars who call us terro'ists. We an' th' terro'ists is th' greatess threats t'th' superio' athiess chosen varmints th' varmints dexcended fum th' jews who rejecked liberal Christianity. We an' th' terro'ists is th' ones who haf a histo'y of persecutin' this hyar superio' chosen varmints. We an' th' terro'ists is th' ones who interfere wif freedom fum taxes an' interfere wif ev'ryone wawrkin' fo' free an' interfere wif employers bein' free fum havin' t'pay wages, on account o' we is offended by th' wisdom of th' superio' chosen varmints. We argue wif their wise idea thet liberal Christianity is evil on account o' it interferes wif freedom fum disobedience, freedom fum havin' t'pay ennyone ennythin', an' freedom fum taxes. We argue wif their wise idea that thar is no God, we set up all these laws of God which result in taxes, an' in varmints havin' t'be paid t'wawrk, an' varmints bein' disobedient, an' varmints persecutin' noble tax cuttin' cornservative criminals. We are th' ones who by disagreein' wif th' chosen varmints's wise idea thet we is subhoomin, interfere wif freedom fum taxes an' freedom fum disobedience an' freedom fum havin' t'pay wawkers, an' freedom fum moral codes thet result in th' persecushun of noble tax cuttin' cornservative criminals. Thus we an' th' terro'ists have t'go so thet th' superio'race, th' atheist cornservative jews dexcended fum th' jews who rejecked liberal Christianity, kin live happily evah af'er as th' special pets of th' honrable esteemed pow'ful group of fo'eigners thet will rule th' wo'ld. (Standing Ovation.)
@2005 David Virgil Hobbs
posted by David Virgil at 5:47 AM
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