Saturday, September 17, 2005

Erin, dal, belts, working class, poems, my brother, sodomites, Brazil, b-ball, blogs, cousins, Lillian, Megan, civil war, fitness for execs--dreams

Dreams I have had since the last time I reported them.

1 Erin G (a lady) met my dad and my brother. She helped set up some electrical equipment I had bought then I went into another room, and started marking off squares about 1" by 1" as in a chess board, on a big piece of wood. Then my brother started bellowing at me like a 12 year old impersonating an NFL football player, in that childish throaty artificially deep tone of voice, basically false krap about how I am doing it wrong and he is smarter etc., because he wanted to impress me and upstage me with Erin. I got angry with my brother. My father took my brother's side. I was thinking, Erin must have left by now; but she was still there to my surprise, she had psychological powers of endurance. I walked her home, she looked like she had aged 30 years just from meeting my father and brother. I kissed her on the corner of her mouth.

2 Night after 9/8: I was at my brother's apartment in Chicago, cutting off pieces of a belt to add belt pockets to my belt, and getting a new belt; I lost track of how much belt leather I had taken and how much money I owed for the belt leather. There was rice and the Indian soup "dal" in the kitchen, but there was concern amongst some people there as to me eating it, was I supposed to eat it? I told them that I was so tired out and inconvenienced by my father's fits of rage that I had to eat it. Above the food was a paper printout keeping track of how much I was eating it for health insurance purposes. Maybe rice and dal, are so healthy that if you could prove you ate them your health insurance would go down. My dad has told me that rice and dal are supposed to be the single best food in the world from a health standpoint.

3 Night after 9/9: I used to be in a cop gang, but then I was in a gang that was not a cop gang, that wore handkerchiefs on their head. Thee was an authoritative guy in the gang, tall white slim and handsome and black haired, who did not wear a bandana on his head, he looked well to do and important, like a military officer, he looked like a young Mitt Romney but he was not Romney. Some gang member used som xerox type machine to print out all these pages, there were recipes for stuff like french toast and pancakes, I felt this hunger for french toast and pancakes. In the recipe for french toast, the type was so small I could barely read it. These pages showed that day after day I was winning in this game in which I invested money everyday in things like stocks. Then I was riding in the direction of Waltham city hall on a bicycle. I felt depressed, like a child who nobody would play with. Like a child, I wanted friends in my immediate neighborhood, and did not want to venture outside of it to search for friends. I was thinking how the important guy at Frosty's bar who looked like LBJ, Dave M., in real life seemed to be telling me (the best anyone can tell anything over the loud music at the bar) that the problem was, that I was managment and the people at the bar were not management, but were labor, workers, and stuff like that. I was remembering how LBJ seemed to like the other side better, how he said, "we're greedy and selfish", how he said Nixon his competitor was "our best president".

4 Night after 9-11 dream: I was watching some internet TV show from Chicago, that interviewed people all over the world, I was thinking they should have the people they interview read one of my poetic prayers; or, that was maybe what they were actually doing. When I awoke I was confused as to whether I felt they should do this or whether they actually were doing it.

5 Night after 9-11 dream: I saw my brother he was in a room I was in, he started babbling in a stream of consciousness type of way, he was in the habit of this kind of babbling. He looked extraordinarily white in the face, whiter than he does in real life. I told him I did not want to see him anymore.

6 Night after 9-11 dream: I was looking at a floor in some large room. A muscular stocky white male's head and upper body werre sticking up out of the floor. He then submerged himself under the floor. Then he came up again. This was a hard, tiled normal floor, but for the human like creatures I was watching, the surface of the floor was like the surface of the water in a swimming pool. One of these creatures that looked like a muscular white male, then begain swimming through and along the surface of the floor, as if the surface of the floor, was the surface of a pool of water. He was doing a powerful crawl stroke. the surface of the floor re-formed itself after his arms and legs hit into it, the same way the water surface reforms itself as a swimmer passes by. Then there were two of these white muscular males on the surface of the floor that was like a water surface for them. Then one of them, who had very wide shoulders, torso, and hips, but flabby buttocks, was sodomizing another one of them. there might have been also a couple of females similar to these males, being lesbian in the floor but I am not sure about that.

7 Night after 9-11 dream: there was this new sporting event in which people played volleyball while standing in water that came up to their waists. The Brazilian men's team, young men with dark brown skin, defeated the USA team in this new water-volleyball event--and the entire time they were playing the US team, they were protesting against President Bush. Then they walked for miles across this very big lake, in which the water throughout the lake was waist-high, protesting against Bush the entire time. They walked across the lake, and got to a point about ten yards from the shore where I was standing, and stood there protesting against Bush.

8 Night after 9-12 dream: This white woman with black slightly wavy hair, who were granny glasses, was siting by a compuer printer that was next to a wall. the printer ws spitting out these big white pages, that were about 14 inches wide, and about 19 inches high, that were filled with small single spaced black type; the text on the pages had to do with some topic I was involved with. The printer spewed out a large number of these pages, some on this sub-topic, others on that sub-topic. I dropped the pages on the ground. The order of the pages became confused. Then I thought, I should use those large paper clips, to separate the sub-topics and I was wondering why I had not thought of using the paper clips before.

9 Night after 9-11 dream: I was on a basketball team that had this pretty, slim white woman who had straight black hair and wore straight black bangs over her forehead. The woman was well over six feet tall, medium to slim in build. She wore a blue bikini bottom the way volleyball players sometimes do, and I think a white shirt. She looked in the face similar to the way I used to look, when I wore bangs when I was younger. I thought she was attractive, but at the same time I thought she was somewhat boring. We were playing a game or practiving on this indoor basketball court. The court had these big blue things on it, of the type high-jumpers and pole vaulters fall into after their leap. Seemed most of us had one of these things to lounge on, right on the court. Seemed most of us had our own computer printer, which was spitting out page after page filled with information about basketball tailored to each of us as an individual. The pages the printers were spitting out were white, big about 14x19 inches, filled with single spaced small black type.

10 Night after 9-12 dream: A phys ed class was being held, seemed on the fields next to the Harvard stadium. As I began running in the direction of the field, I slipped and fell in the mud, the field was very wet amd muddy. The mud was not dirty, but I had the feeling that it as no very pure mud either, I was wondering to what extent it was mixed with dogshit. Megan F and me were in the same phys ed class. I did'nt see her but I knew she was in the class. We both had a blog. The way we posted our blogs, was by writing them out in big letters on these white walls that were about 20 feet high. Megan's blog post was about to appear on this big computer monitor that was about 30 feet high, that slanted backwards. I could see this blank page opened on the big monitor, with a URL address bar on top. I was excited and impatient about seeing her blog post. A conflict developed, because Megan was about to start writing out a blog post on a wall, and therefore I could not write out my blog-post on the wall because my blog-post had to be a certain distance below Megan's blog-post, and nobody knew how long Megan's blog post would be. I thought this was weird, because Megan and I had our own separate blogs. I had to mark off the start of my blog post, by heating up these things that looked like American pennies, in a large microwave oven with curving sides and top, that was blackish dark gray on the outside and about ten feet high, and then putting the red hot pennies into the wall, forming a line of a few pennies. There was some regulation, that if my picture appeared in a blog, I had to be dresssed in these suspenders that crossed on the chest, the suspender over my left shoulder crossing over to my right side, and the suspender on my right shoulder crossing over to my left side--but they had not been enforcing this regulation. Then I met this clean shaven black haired young man in a suit, who was holding these brown pants with the crossing suspenders attached to them. They had now decided to enforce the regulation about the crossing suspenders to my surpise. But I wa not planning on posting my photo in the blog post,so I did not feel I had to wear the crossing suspenders. Some important game was starting involving the phys ed class outdoors outside the hallway. I was impatient to get out there and not miss the excitement. I ws wondering how the phys ed teacher would get me into the game if I was late. One of the teams was dressed in brown long sleeved shirts and brown pants, there were about fifty of them packed together on a sideline in about three rows of about fifteen each, they looked like they were dressed in football uniforms but without the pads and the helmets, none of them was over my height of about five feet ten inches, alot of them had rown straight collar length hair, I was not sure if they were boys or boys mixed with girls.

11 Night after 9-13 dream: I was meeting with all these cousins of mine that I didnt know I had. My brother ws messing up the meeting by acting as if the only important thing was what HE enjoyed and what HE liked to do, and by presumptuously dumping himself upon the meeting, taking it for granted that I wanted him around, assuming he was invited. Lillian was at this cousins meeting, she was a cousin or similar to one, she lay there naked, her chest was very big, it looked like the chest of a man with a huge chest, llike the chest of one of these barrel chested wrestlers or strongmen with huge chests. I had these two cousins I didnt know I had, who were brothers, one was short and wore glasses, had brown hair, was the smart energetic but nice type, his brother had light brown hair, was about six feet tall, athletically built, wore tight pants and a tight shirt, he was the energetic lady's man type, he wore a short-sleeved shirt with a collar, and dress shoes. Some of these cousins/cousin like people, always had their cat in their lap while they talked to each other. A few of them would sit there, each with their cat in their lap, talking to each other. They tended to sort of retreat into the rooms in this big house we were in, isolating themselves. They were also addicted to these small toys, that resembled animals or people. There were a couple of other things about them that I did not like. My cousin Kerry, a real cousin who I already knew was a cousin, was there. She looked short and stocky and wide shouldered, she wore a plad long sleeved shirt, though she was adult in the dream her face had that handsome/pretty square jawed look it had when she was a child. Her hair was shoulder length brown and wavy. I did some basketball shooting during this dream aboutt meeting cousins I didnt know I had. I was practicing cutting to my right before shooting though I am a lefty. I took a running jump shot from the top of the key, from pro distance three point land (a shot I cahn hit at about forty percent) and it went in. Seemed to me shooting baskets was a good exercise not too tiring not too sedentary not too boring--but the experts will tell you shooting baskets is too sedentary to do you good.

12 Night after 9-15 dream: Megan and I got married. She walked into the door of the place where we lived holding a baby we had had in her hands. The baby looked like a large light green luminescent piece of marijuana about a foot long. The place where we were living was too small for the three of us which depressed me. I felt shocked that I had gotten into this marriage and baby thing, and I regretted it--Megan after having had the baby had become pudgy.

13 A dream I forgot to write down: Civil war broke out all across the nation, between myself and Danny R the boyhood friend who is now a business school dean. I did not know whether he was the Yanks and I was the Rebs or vice versa. Seemed the dream did not involve physical violence type war but rather the war of ideas. Seemed the war of ideas had to do with the subject of business management.

14 A dream I forgot to write down, that I felt sure I had written down, but could not find in my notes: I wrote a paper about twenty pages long about business management and the education of business managers. Instead of covering the topic of what the business schools out there are doing, I plunged into whatever I felt like plunging into in the topic of business management and the education of business managers. I enjoyed writing the paper because of the freedom I gave myself re what would be written about. The paper was clever and humorous, fun to read in a topic where much of the reading is stultifying. It was a smart paper but written competently so as to make the subject matter understandable. In one paragraph, I got into the issue of physical conditioning for executives. A couple of footnoted lines in the paper, said, in the context of discussing fitness for execs, that the best way to train for a mile, was to run four miles non-stop. I think one of the footnotes cited something written by a Mr. Wise. The paragraph included a formula I had invented which allowed one to devise a training routine for a given distance track event, using the distance run in the given track event and working from there. I was trying to put the lines about a mile and four miles into boldface type but having some difficulty doing this. When I woke up the feeling I had, was that the message in the dream is that the best type of physical fitness training for execs is that they should be good at running the mile and that they could become good at running the mile by running four miles non-stop.

15 A dream I had earlier, prior to the previous dream report, that I forgot to report: Matt Lauer from the NBC show had interviewed two or three soldiers who told him that troop morale in Iraq is high. In the dream the thought in my head was that the interview was a staged, phony interview, involving interviewing people who were for all practical purposes paid actors.

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